A just another day / Просто ещё один день

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(Edited)



Hi everybody! Всем привет! Hola a todos! Bonjour à tous! Hallo allerseits! Поздрав свима!




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A just another day





Talking about today I should to mention all was as yesterday, I tried not to eat too much at breakfast. This time I managed to limit myself to a cappuccino with a chocolate donut. Experiencing the most severe torments, I resolutely gave up scrambled eggs and sausage, cheese, capers and cherry tomatoes ...

After breakfast we went on a short tour around the resort in order to have a fun time. As soon as the guide uttered the first sounds, we were surprised: how a person with such an unpleasant voice can work in this service sector?
Local guides are sure that every tourist should have a desire to see the nearest waterfall. Being firmly convinced of our need, our gide strongly suggest to us to buy tickets. Without hesitation, he doubled the price.
In response, we indulged in our favorite game, which is called 'Bring the guide to the boiling point'. To begin with, we gave up buying tickets and entered the waterfall through the fence, not far from the ticket office ...




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The guide turned out to be simple-minded, he deceived and joked equally ineptly. It is simply a sin to offend such a person - we began to behave less defiantly, figuratively speaking, we went into the shadows. But we still refused to pay for tickets and drinks.
The soul was asking for a storm, and then we came across the owner of two parrots. He wanted incredible money for a photo with two sad birds.



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The grabber tried to communicate with us in Russian, but we stubbornly pretended to be French, which led him to a stupor.
We managed to first arrange a test photo session with birds... and then we arranged a real oriental bazaar. The dude wanted the price in euros, but we made him an offer in lira and ... in rubles. At some point, he realized that he was deceived and tried to threaten - it greatly amused us...
This bazaar quickly bored our squad, we left the battlefield in the same way as we came to it - from the left flank ... the owner of the parrots followed us and moaned to the very barrier, and then the fence tore us apart forever.



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After the waterfall, the bus took us to a ruined city in the mountains. The place is really cool. The guide was talking utter nonsense on the topic. I could not restrain myself, bile splashed out in the form of tricky questions. The guide quickly realized that he was being pushed onto thin ice and honestly admitted that he was not a historian and was retelling information from a local website ...





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After such a disarming confession, to kicking the lecturer would be no longer merciful. Turning around, I noticed a disgusting character, the owner of a funny monkey. Outwardly, he almost did not differ from his brother, he was just as hairy and funny, only without a collar. The dude's greed was off scale, this baboon also wanted a price in euros. To begin with, we amused ourselves by giving the monkey different objects - it dragged everything into its mouth. It was really fun ...
the elder brother and part-time owner of the monkey, quickly realized that he was wasting time and tried to take the monkey away from us. However, we followed him and checked whether the monkey would swallow 25 euro cents. The "baboon" started to get angry and shouted at us. It was so much fun that we were holding our bellies ...




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A favorite pastime of local tour business tycoons is squeezing money out of stupid tourist-looking Pinocchio.
When it comes to dinner, hungry tourists are first taken to a paid buffet, where they have to buy fucking cakes and drinks at exorbitant prices. We torpedoed this idea by demonstratively pouring whiskey into paper cups. Then, to a brisk "Let's go" toast, we made the first drink and ate sandwiches and hamburgers from the hotel lunchboxes. This infuriated the smart-ass innkeeper. He started shouting something to the guide ... but he just shrugged his shoulders.




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We supported the oriental bazaar with exclamations "Let's go! Second drink!" and ate a lemon plucked from a nearby tree. The owner of the tree fell into a falsetto, probably he also wanted to get a price in euros ...
After a boring boat ride on the lake, the guide brought us to an authentic family restaurant, where he convincingly asked us to behave more decently and not drink the drinks we brought from hotel so provocatively, because the owner of the restaurant is the mother of his matchmaker/brother, sort of ...



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We respected the polite request - we drank whiskey from our sleeves. The matchmaker's mother, bringing the dishes, sniffed alarmingly, but prudently kept silent.
For this we encouraged her by buying a bottle of Coca-Cola, but only for lira and strictly at the fallen rate against the euro! During the bargaining, her face wrinkled like last year's lemon ...



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The fish served was simply gorgeous, we relented and bought 25 drops each of the local brew 'raki'. The grimace on the hostess's face loosened a little. Most likely, she was finally released when our bus departed ...

And then evening came, we played bingo. After each announcement of a number, mad shouts were heard from our table and a toast followed. The clown-presenter was anxiously interested, are we really so lucky?
From our table, someone shouted bingo five more times before the presenter began to suspect something ...




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А потом пришла ночь, началось диско...

Русская версия


Если говорить про сегодня, то все было как и вчера, лишь бы не сьесть лишнего на завтрак... в этот раз удалось ограничиться капучиной с шоколадным донатом, отказавшись от яичницы с колбасой, да с сыром, да с каперсами, да с помидорками черри...
После завтрака отправились на водопад. Посмотреть местные водопады - непременная обязанность отдыхающего.
Мы предались нашей любимой забаве - 'Доведи гида до кипения'. Для начала отказались от покупки билетов на водопад и перелезли сбоку от входа через забор... настроение как-то сразу улучшилось...
Гид попался простодушный, обманывал и шутил одинаково неумело. Обижать такого просто грех - мы стали вести себя менее вызывающе, ушли в тень. Но за билеты и напитки платить все же отказывались.
Душа просила бури, и тут под руку попался владелец двух попугаев. Он хотел несусветных денег за фото с двумя ободранными уставшими птицами.
Хапуга пытался общаться с нами на русском, но мы упрямо изображали французов, что приводило его в ступор.
Удалось сначала устроить пробную фотосессию с попками... а потом у строили форменный восточный базар. Чувак хотел цену в евро, а ему делали предложение в лирах и... рублях. Тут он понял, что его накололи и пытался угрожать, что нас сильно развеселило...
После водопада поехали в разрушенный город в горах. Местечко реально клевое. Гидша несла по теме несусветную ересь. Сдержаться не удалось, желчь выплеснулась наружу в виде каверзных вопросов. Тетка быстро сообразила, что ее толкают на тонкий лед и честно призналась, что она не историк и толкает инфу с турецкого сайта...




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После столь обезоруживающего признания пинать диктора было бы уже не милосердно. Обернувшись вокруг, я заметил отвратительного карабаса, владельца смешной обезьянки. Внешне он почти не отличался от собрата, был такой же волосатый и ржачный, только без ошейника. Жадность абонента зашкаливала, этот бабуин тоже хотел евро. Для начала мы развлеклись тем, что давали обезьяне разные предметы - она все тащила в рот. Это была реальная ржака... старший брат и владелец мартышки, быстро понял, что теряет время и попытался унести от нас обезьянку. Однако мы пошли за ним и проверяли проглотит ли мартышка 25 евроцентов. "Бабуин" начал злиться и кричал на нас. Мы держались за животы...
Мы поддержали восточный базар возгласами "Поехали! Второй дринк!" и закусили лимоном сорванным с соседнего дерева. Хозяин дерева сорвался на фальцет, наверное тоже хотел получить цену в евро...
После занудной прогулки на лодке по озеру, гид привез нас в аутентичный семейный ресторан, где убедительно просил нас вести себя более прилично и не пить принесенные с собой напитки столь вызывающе, потому что хозяйка ресторана мать его свата/брата...



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Вежливую просьбу уважили - пили виски из-под полы. Мама свата/брата поднося блюда тревожно принюхивалась, но благоразумно молчала.
За это мы поощрили ее покупкой бутылки кока-колы, но исключительно за лиры и строго по упавшему курсу к евро! Во время торга ее лицо сморщилось как прошлогодний лимон...

Рыба была просто шикарной, мы смягчились и купили по 25 капель местного пойла, ракии. Бабулина гримаса немного ослабла. Скорее всего ее окончательно отпустило, когда отбыл наш автобус...

А потом пришел вечер, мы играли в бинго. После каждого объявления цифры с нашего стола раздавались безумные крики и следовал тост. Клоун ведущий беспокойно интересовался, неужели нам так везет?
С нашего столика еще пять раз кто-то кричал бинго, прежде чем ведущий не начал что-то подозревать...






Stand by















Sincerely yours

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#travel
#oc
#curie
#gems
#palnet
#talentclub
#powerhousecreatives
#photomag
#upmewhale
#photomag
#photomag
#palnet



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6 comments
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Holy shit this had me laughing my ass off! Good stuff! The photos look great too.

It's always a funny adventure when you play the scammer's games against the scammers. It's crazy that people fall for some of these tricks. My problem is that I start to think everything is a scam, even when it's not.

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(Edited)

Thanks for reading)))))))
I hope my english is enough

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Yes, it looks almost perfect. Phrases like "We torpedoed this idea..." makes me think your English is very advanced (or your translation software is 😁).

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Hiya, @ybanezkim26 here, just swinging by to let you know that this post made it into our Honorable Mentions in Daily Travel Digest #1166.

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