Punday Monday 302!
Welcome to Punday Monday!
tl;dr
Make a pun about the topic of the week,
This week’s topic is Bees!
Here's how to make a pun, if you don't know: https://peakd.com/contest/@improv/puns-and-prizes-learn-to-pun-easy-fun-anybody-can-be-a-hit-at-parties
New To Punday?
Pull up a stool, order a spiked PUNch, and get to know some of the regulars. I'm your PUNtender, @improv.
How To Make a Pun
This contest is open to everyone. Here's a handy dandy guide on how to make a pun: Learn to Pun
Rules for the PUN-test:
- If you hope to win a prize [1 100% upvote per punster, 2 HSBI for a win), your pun must be your original work
- Puns must be relevant to the topic of the week to win a prize, but they can be very loosely related.
Last Week's Punday Monday:
Here is last week's Punday Monday, and all the puns that were eligible to win this week are in the comments!
Hang on to your PUNderwear. The Winner of This Week's PUNday Monday Is...
OH, WAS THAT NOT ENOUGH POMP AND CIRCUMSTANCE FOR YOU?
How’s THIS:
Best Pun...
Best Pun of the Entire Week...
Best Overall Pun (click it)...
DRUMROLL PLEASE…..
This Week's Pun Topic Is:
Bees
As in
If you hear from a bunch of bees in a business brainstorming meeting, all you’re going to get out of them is “Hive got a good idea!”
I'm So Good at Puns
If you've never punned before, it might seem like magic! You can do it, too! Learn how in My Free How-To Guide on Punning!
Related Content:
- @freewritehouse offers writing and word-smithing contests every week
- https://bit.ly/improvonpopin to join me on a gaming app where I host funny trivia on Sunday nights, and Spades, Hearts, and Liar’s dice on Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday
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Unfortunately I don't have time to join in on the buzz at LOLZ's Pun House today. I've been very bee-sy.
Writing this travesty felt like kicking a beehive. 😂
Unfortunately, more such travesties are coming your way. Get ready to feel the sting.
Every day, Mr. bee comes home to his wife after a long hard day of work at the hive. While noticeably exhausted, he always greets her with an enthusiastic, "Honey I'm home!"
It was mating season. The queen bee and her male cohorts congregated in the air to begin the process of reproducing. The queen bee gave her favorite males the largest shares of honey. Bob, a particularly romantic bee who did not get anything, in a fit of jealousy, yelled to the queen, "Honey! I can't bee-lieve it... I have been bee-trayed. My heart shall wax poetic, for it stings."
In a beehive in Britain: Billy the Bombastic Worker Bumblebee was bumbling around the Hive. Queen Bee, flustered by Billy's blustery bumbling, blurted in her British accent, "Billy, you bombastic bum, STOP the bomb-elling and bee-hive yourself!"
Once upon a time, there was a bee named Beenjamin who took a break from buzzing around the hive to go on a vocation. He met a ladybug named Lucy and asked her to bee his girlfriend. She said yes, and they lived happily ever after until one day, they realized they both had a terrible fear of clowns.
@improv Now this is what I call a shaggy bee story.
LOL!
The bee's last job was working part-time as a census worker. He enjoyed statistics and collecting information through different sampling methods. After that, he would enjoy a nice meal and call it a day. His wife asked him what he did after the day was done. He would reply "poll and ate"
Do you know why you would never see the bees at their hive? Because they are beesy-bodies and they are always out for gossip
@rayius
Jerry is an elderly man with slowly failing vision. One day, he was passing by a dog costume contest and encountered this majestic creature.
He raises his fist in the air, yelling, "These rotten dog-gone bees just keep getting bigger and bigger!"
Blebber, the alcoholic bee, drank a lot of alcohol overnight. He bumbled off to work in the morning, clumsily carrying and spilling honey all over place. Blebber reported to the Queen Bee, bumbling over his words, "I-I'm sorry, my Quinn. I'm-I'm just a little buzzed."
After the untimely death of his father by the hand of a sting operation, Buzzlet the Bee goes into a state of contemplation, deciding whether the taste of the nectar of life is sweeter than that of a suicidal vengeance. As his close friends gather around him to hear the buzz, he ponders, "To bee or not to bee - that is question."
Being a soldier in the bee army is no easy task... These stripes have to be earned.