Toxic Love: After Effects and How to Cope

Hello, everyone.

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Welcome to my blog and another wonderful edition of the Hive Learners' featured post. Most of us have had experience with toxic relationships, and even if we haven't, we have lived in a neighborhood where toxic relationships existed. A toxic relationship leaves a scar on the victim—not just physical scars but also emotional scars.

Toxic relationships are not just relationships between lovers but can also be relationships between siblings, cousins, friends, or neighbors. Once a relationship or friendship is one-sided, it's said to be toxic. When you try to force things to work between you and a person, then it's toxic.

Relationships should flow without being forced to, and the energy should be the same from both parties. A relationship that costs you your peace of mind is too expensive to keep, and you should let it go or fix it if you can.

A person who suffers from a toxic relationship can easily fall into depression. Suicidal thoughts flow through the mind of a toxic relationship victim. A toxic relationship is one of the emotional problems that kills faster than the rest. A toxic relationship kills the victim from the inside out, leaving nothing behind.

My toxic relationship experience.

Many who came out of a toxic relationship changed their way of life, and everything about them changed. Way back in 2013, when we first moved to Cross River State, we had a neighbor who was a bachelor but had come of age and was ready to settle down. One day, he brought a beautiful lady to my mom and introduced her as his fiancée. We were all happy and already had plans for how we were going to devour the meat and everything on that day.

Ukata is his name, and his fiance's name is Christiana. We thought things were going well with the new relationship, whereas she was dying on the inside. Ukata beats her up and treats her like a piece of sh*t; she kept it a secret from the neighbors until she no longer could and opened up to my mom.

Showing my mom her back and how he beat her up like his little sister, leaving scars all over her body. My mom tried talking to him, but instead of having a change of mind, he beat her up again, claiming that she reported him to my mom. My mom told her to let the relationship go since it's not working as planned, but she refused.

She later left Ukata's house one night without letting anyone know she was leaving. After so many years, we crossed paths again, and I was eavesdropping on her conversation with my mom. She said that after her experience with Ukata, she has not let any other man come anywhere near her, and she does not need a man for any reason. She said

Her experience with him has changed her perspective on men and how she sees them. It left a scar both physically, emotionally, and mentally.

How to cope

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  • open up: Talking to a person about how toxic one's relationship is can go a long way and can help one escape the pain that comes with it. Don't open up to a person without understanding or to a person who will make mockery of you later.

Thanks for reading my post.



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18 comments
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I went through it. I was willing to do everything but she only had me for fun. she had another...

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These days people find it very difficult to trust their partners for reasons like this. I am sorry about how she made you feel.

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(Edited)

The toxic relationship will eventually change you if you stay too long. I am sorry for Christaina to experience domestic violence without justice.



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Domestic violence is the worst of all, if you don't have peace in your own house then when and where are you ever going to have peace?

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thats is it.. in Nigeria, domestic violence and adultery is the major cause of breakup

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I'm not praying for any lady to witness this domestic violence of a thing but you see most of these ladies suffering from this, they deserve it. I don't know why this love is so blind to them that makes them stay in a toxic relationship. I usually advices People, once he beats you, leave the relationship. Period!

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Some believe they can change the man and stay, instead of changing him they become his punching bag.

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It's a pity for her. Her past toxic relationship already affected her emotionally to the point of not allowing any other man come close to her
I do not support such relationship, it's either I fix it if possible or I let go

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I do not support such relationship, it's either I fix it if possible or I let go.

Exactly but I still wonder how some people do it, clearly it's not working but they still won't let go.

Thanks for reading.

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I hate it. I grew up in a house where I never saw my dad raise his hand it my mum and I will teach me children same.

One person completely changed her perception towards all men, even the good one. I hope she heals completely, God loves her

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I like the fact you will pass it on to your kids, growing up in a house like yours must be peaceful.

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Some men can be cruel, I wonder what kid of pleasure they derive from beating a woman. I just hope she eventually heals because it seems that the brutality she experienced has traumatized her.

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I wonder what goes through a minds mind when he hits a woman or fights like she's a man as well.

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Even if she is his little sister he doesn’t have the right to just keep beating her up as he wish. When she is not a drum set. Even drum sets are beaten on occasions.

And I don’t know why it’s always the cool ladies and submissive ones that do fall in the hands of these evil men. And Same way to some guys too. The cool guys fall in pits of the witches.

God help us. I know her perspective will change out of her experience. You

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