Naughty Bear - My WORST Gaming Experience Ever.

The year was 2010. There was this game on the shelf that reminded my cousin, @oblivioncubed and myself of the Teddy Bear Army from Conkers Bad Fur Day for the N64. Conker's is one of our top 5 games of all time, so when we saw what we thought was similar bears with the same cheeky attitude we had to buy it and check it out. Naughty Bears for the Xbox 360 turned out to be the "No Man's Sky" of that generation. An aesthetically pleasing game with a good concept foiled by having puddle thin game-play.

That's not to say the game is total crap. The core concept is good. The controls in game (as far as I remember) were good, and it was fun. For the first hour. Once you make it to stage 2 you have a heart dropping feeling when you realise the level stage is EXACTLY THE SAME AS THE FIRST just with textures swapped out for a different theme.

"Alright, maybe this is like a mini-level and the next stage will have a new map design and layout." You think to yourself, naively.

Big negatory on that one good buddy. The level is also the same as the first. But now it's Halloween theme? Dafuq? I thought this was about a birthday party...

Oh, that's right. Because this was pre- your Friday 13th/Evolved/Dead Before Daylight games, this game had a cheesy story mode put on. Admittedly, it's got some camp factor that makes it the right kind of cheese. That part of the game is well aged. The basic premise is that your teddy bear didn't get invited to a rival bears birthday party. Time to get naughty. That's about it.

A typical level is based around hiding, setting traps, attacking the other bear and then being forced back into hiding. Rinse and repeat until completion. There is also a fear-multiplier system to help increase your score.

But, the core loop at the heart of Naughty Bear is inherently flawed and lacklustre. Where the game shines a bit is in multiplayer mode. The most popular was Jelly Wars, which took on the asymmetrical Dead by Daylight method of pitting the Naughty Bear against three other players. But that was ten years ago when the game was fresh and new. Now, there is nobody playing online and you would not get the best experience buying this game.

2/10 wouldn't even give my copy to a friend.