It's all right

When I was working in my earlier years, I had always have this mindset that even when my patient is very sick and dying, I still need to give them the best care possible.It takes a toll on anyone whose job is taking good care of the sick and the dying. When a patient dies on me, I feel sad.

Don't get me wrong. There is always a boundary that I maintain which involves me thinking of everything as work. In fact, its a non negotiable one and, I exert a lot of effort to maintain that.

Perhaps its very unprofessional of me to feel sad. But, I have to remember that as a human being,we are all hardwired to relate to each other even when its all a part of a job.

When my patients dies, I often stop for a moment to give me a breathing space. I reflect on how that person have spent their entire lives with their families or what they are passionate about. The places they probably visited, the things they enjoy and love.

At the end of the day, when I go home and remove my uniform, I always console myself with this:

I did the best for that person until the last moment.

I have not have anyone dying on me in my current job. I hope it stays that way. But when it does happen, I hope I can be as strong and honest as I am now to recognize that sometimes, its all right to be sad when someone dies.