stranger in the house
My roommate felt like a stranger this past month. After placing his notice that he’s moving, I was happy for him to move on to bigger and better things.
But then things went missing and careless things happened. He was too busy working that his room was too messy to show to prospective roommates. And despite a deluge of apologies, situations were not smoothed over.
I got more uncomfortable after an unusual show of flattery and gifting. It’s an odd thing to be triggered by niceties.
I accept compliments by people I admire. But when people I don’t admire give me gifts and words of flattery, alarm bells start ringing. Ding! Ding! Ding! Who is this person? What’s going on?
He is a person that INSPIRED me to get a camera for my bedroom after I noticed he turned off the baby monitor I had facing the front door.
Why shut down a camera that’s always been there? I noticed it was unplugged this week and reconnected it thinking it was missed after getting a new modem last month. He immediately noticed the camera up and running. That sounded the alarm bells louder. I scheduled friends to visit so I wouldn’t be alone.
JNET: “Why mess with something I have to keep us safe? It only faces the front door. He turned the camera away.”
S: “Maybe he thinks it’s an invasion of his privacy and wants to bring girls over.”
JNET: “ He’s welcome to bring anyone over. He was there when I got the camera. He could’ve said his peace then if he had an issue.”
S: “Just talk about it with him. It’s probably no big deal. And your stuff going missing is him being a stupid dude misplacing stuff.”
We never had the talk. He came home just as I needed to leave to teach.
Since I was still connected to the WiFi while sitting in my car, I decided to open the app to the new camera, and see if it was working. What happened next shocked me. As soon as I started my car...he was at my bedroom door trying to open it. He even got a flashlight out.
Who is this person???
I felt stunned and ill. I went to teach my piano lesson and cancelled the evening lessons. I came home armed with a bag of groceries and told my roommate that my best friend was en route for dinner and asked how soon will he be out. After agreeing on a fair time, I told him that even if I found him likable, things he’s done this final month has created fires and disruption. I was stressed out and he was apologetic.
I didn’t ask why he tried to get into my bedroom. Talking to him eye to eye, I wondered how safe was I.
He’s gone. He turned in his keys but they look too shiny. It’s terrible. But I suspect he still has keys to my home.
It’s 6pm. I’m exhausted. While everyone is enjoying super bowl parties tomorrow, I will be cleaning and securing my home.
JNET
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That is a very creepy story. I would definitely change the locks.
It’s been a super creepy final week with him. I’m tired. Burning incense and sprinkling holy water to chase out the old energy.
J
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This is a great example why I can't do roommates. Good on you for having cameras. I will keep you in my thoughts that he will quickly become consumed in his new doings and you quickly become an afterthought to him.
I am still very anxious. My heart is racing like a frightened bunny. I’ve had great roommates in the past but this one feels like a snake in the grass. First time I accepted someone with no social media to look at. (He said it was too time consuming)
I’m hoping that he moves on with his new life and I never see him again AND sadly I’m also preparing for the worst. Thanks for keeping me in your thoughts.
J
For what it's worth, I also have no social media other than this place, which I use more as a blogging/learning site.
I’ve made friends with bloggers that I felt comfortable enough to have as house guests when they traveled my way. I would trust a person’s written word more than the image and photos they post of themselves.
Im tempted to ask for an essay on top of personal references with my next roommate.
J