Motivation Lost

in #random3 months ago

Like lots of people I go through creative cycles. Cycles from high to low motivation, or maybe it is closer to cycles from where it is easy to start and to times that its harder.

I'm in the part of the cycle where it is hard to start.

I procrastinate the simplest, most straightforward tasks, letting them build up till my brain is full of them and I can't possibly get them all done. Instead of just doing the thing as they come up I decide that its time to take a nap, go for a walk, "self-care", etc.

Or maybe it isn't important compared to this other thing that I'm also not going to do.

The end result is piles. Virtual and real.

I have piles of papers, unopened mail, etc all around me. A trash can that is overflowing with paper and used tea bags. There is an unending list of emails, DMs, etc from friends and colleagues that I avoid. I avoid them even if they are from people that I enjoy talking to.

Just keeping up with the non-negotiable (self negotiation) tasks and responsibilities take all my mental energy.

Finding a way out

This #shitpost is my first step. Something I hear often from productivity experts, or life hackers is just START. This is similar to Seth Godin's thoughts on writers block and "the drip", commit to doing it, and don't worry about it being great.

I struggle with this A LOT. I want to have great content, but that bar for "great" is too high for me to even get started.

What I'm trying to do with this post is shift the thinking, start thinking about content creation as a practice that I can explore, similar to how I approach my engineering practice. I find (or am given) problems that I can solve through an exploration.

In my professional life that exploration starts with an investigation of the problem and possible solutions that will fit best into the existing processes and operations of my clients. From there I start "dripping" ideas and sketches to them so we can navigate to a final solution that can be implemented by construction companies, software developers, etc.

Dripping my way to freedom

Starting with important but not critical.

My commitment going forward is to spend the first chunk of my day, after coffee, working on something that is important but without deadline. Preferably this is something that is creative, something that will start my brain working in the right direction, but without the NEED to do it.

If I get to my desk and I don't know what that is today, I will open a text document and free write a post here.

With creating my content I will focus on the process, the practice, and get my thoughts into the void.