This post follows on from Part-1: The Psychedelic History Of A Boat & The Magic Of Shrooms, which I recommend reading for a somewhat broader context.
In Part-II I would like to share some of my experiences as they pertain to this healing and guidance aspect of Magic Mushrooms. I kept brief 'morning after' notes of a number of my trips over the past 5 years and I will find a way of presenting them.
There's very little if anything that comes to mind to add to the above quote from Part-1. The content is, as you can imagine, highly subjective.
Therefore I present you with just my notes, slightly expanded here for clarity. You will have to make of them what you will :).
The following are trips from Shrooms every one of which was lovingly and respectfully picked from Scottish horse and sheep poo-filled fields by me, in September 2016.
- Spirit of Mushroom emerged and danced in front of me in my room, in the candle-light: "I am you, you are me"
- I became one with the dancing Spirit of Shroom - Consciousness(es) in sync. I have no recollection, eyes open or shut made no difference to vision!
- "If you smoke a joint just now you will be disconnected from experiencing the Mushroom Head".
- I briefly glimpsed a dimension where I had a regular and familiar presence amongst beings of whom I was one. It felt sociable. I was being gently urged to join them but resisted, not wishing to leave LK behind. I was told that "those who are going to come will be there on the other side!"
- early in the trip a Veil was clearly and explicitly lifted, visually removed. I was reassured that it was all OK
- for a while I was aware of being boxed in - the room was narrow and closing in. This did not feel oppressive however. Standing up - which I knew would 'release' me' - took around 2 hours because I kept getting entrenched in Thought
- my stomach gave me feedback on my thoughts. When I had thoughts of effort - where words are formed or attempted to be formed - I would feel uneasy. This uneasiness would dissipate as I moved from Left-Brain to Heart-Mind, and the effortlessness of free-flow
- I was inspected by curious beings - I wasn't afraid and gave my consent
- I encountered Cockroach, towering above with feelers waving as it looked down and checked me out. I was honest in admitting my long-standing abhorrence of cockroaches but was able to maintain presence without fear or disgust and in doing so, perceived something noble. The cockroach entourage sensed this and looked at one another in surprise, pleased at my compliment.
Nov 2016 (Full Moon)
- whatever I give Attention (focus) to reveals itself to me. In order to understand, I need to give FULL attention. Attention + a little time = Understanding
- the Moon breathing in and out of the clouds! Observed out of the corner of my eye how the plants, trees and grass DRANK up the Full Moon Energy
- "Be out in Nature"
- "In some way you are blocking (not allowing yourself to receive) Help, Guidance, Love. This is at a VERY DEEP level of entry. At this level, an automatic block of sorts goes up. Although this may refer to 'inner' guidance, it is equally valid for interactions with the 'external' world....... and what's the difference anyway? :)"
- I had some closed-eye visuals. In one of them I encountered a being moving around on a skateboard on top of which was a platform/podium behind which it was standing. Somehow I had the sense that it was an emissary of Mushroom. It was eating with its three extended tube-like mouths. I greeted it and was aware of not having any fear
- writing this, I became aware that the being was consuming/eating (and therefore removing) the heaviness and negativity I have felt of late, and which I currently feel free of!
- "PROPERLY start to discover for yourself now! Don't look to the outside (to what other people say / what you might expect drugs or altered states to do for you) any longer for answers. You have to navigate this yourself!"
- I had a sense of the ENORMITY of M, my ex-wife's sense of utter aloneness during our time together, especially after she lost her dad!
- "draw your senses (Perception) in - but not people / events"
- "find your 'non-thinking' state. Become consciously aware of it and bring it more and more into the everyday"
- "give things (other beings / everything) time to 'reveal' themselves....... do this through Attention!"
Slow, mellow rise. Was sitting but had the sense of being guided to lie down and did so. Stable, calm, smiling inside. Some closed-eye visuals of discordance and confused, agitated colours and shapes. Sometimes there was the appearance of aggressive or monster-like beings. I had a strong awareness that this was 'appearance' only. I did not feel threatened and could therefore feel warm and loving towards them. There was a sense of letting go - as if the 'dark' beings were aspects of me or else stuff I've been carrying. At one point I reached for my hairband to take it off so that my head might be flat on the pillow. The band snapped as I removed it and the snapping felt symbolic and connected with the letting go. The experience was gentle and soft and I feel fresh the next morning (now).
There are two more trips I'd like to add Mushroom messages from. These are from 2014 - 2015, a period of super-great-extreme Intensity in my life (internal and external). I hadn't tripped on Shrooms for many years at that point and the experiences were powerful.
What is the Barrier to Perception?
I was taken on a swirling multi-coloured 'tour' of imagination with the ever present question: What is the barrier to Perception? I had the sense of exploring the question in great depths, zooming in and out of possibilities as to what this might be. It was a complete rollercoaster ride - I was taken on a trip. Each time it had been satisfactorily demonstrated to me that the particular object of consideration was not the 'barrier' we were looking for - swoosh, I'd be energetically pulled away to the next consideration. None of what we examined was it. There was always this ever-present upper limit - this line or barrier - which could not be penetrated. Then we started getting closer to this line - and I came right up against it, right underneath where it was floating. It was then that I saw / perceived / understood / knew that this line, this barrier to perception was nothing other than Thought itself.
Where is Love not?
I was in a place of severe isolation, especially psychological/mental. I was going through a (self-labelled) psychosis where different 'selves' were making themselves known vociferously, each scrambling for its own sense of dominance and control. The task of 'I' taking charge and non-violently uniting all these internal tribes was only just getting underway. I didn't know if I would make it or not. Everything familiar and comfortable was decaying before my eyes. Similar to the 'quest' for the Barrier to Perception, on this 'trip' I was taken on another 'tour'. This time we were seeking the places where Love (the version that is UNCONDITIONAL) may not be found. Once again we went in deep, we went to places where it couldn't possibly be, right! But it was everywhere, buried beneath layers and layers upon layers perhaps, but these layers were peeled back revealing it to be ever-present....... no exceptions whatsoever. You, dear reader may imagine just how amazing, comforting, beautiful, empowering this experience was for me, taking place as it did within the turbulent context that I describe!
Thanks for reading.