Zeke thoughts is your weekly trip into my brain where I dwell upon lessons learned, a bit of wisdom passed my way, or something funny that had me pause in reflection. I haven't spoken to my buddy @wesphilbin in a while but he is bearer of the #thoughtfuldailypost flag.

This week, I have been thinking about those battling through dementia, particularly in an age of social distancing. I caught up with a dementia specialist this week to discuss this and what we can do to help.

source: lhsfna.org <===need to prune that acronym!

I learned dementia is a broad term which covers many types of diseases and conditions which negatively effect the brain caused diminished function. This pandemic would not make much sense to many with dementia and often will lead to increased confusion as to why loved ones are not coming to visit any more.

I let that sink in for a bit and tried to put myself in the shoes of someone with this condition. It felt quite shitty and I shivered out of that dream with a need to be a part of the solution.

This lady is apparently quite revolutionary in her approach to dementia care https://teepasnow.com/ "Until there is a cure, there is care." Not bad at all. She has a local specialist https://withcaretraining.ca/ with whom I was able to connect and learn more about how we can help.

We discussed someone who has newly entered long-term care and experiencing confusion due either to the huge transition, foreign medication, advanced age or all of these and potentially many more. This challenging situation is often compounded by family and people with power of attorney not knowing this ailment or how to deal with it.

Here are the points I managed to jot down so that I could share.

• Reflecting back is good - Tell stories they know from memory. Engage them in their recollection and most memorable parts.

• Validate and Acknowledge - Agreeing with ideas, observations and feelings will help. Replying with something understanding along the lines of "I am so sorry you have to go through that" or "Help me understand how that feels" will be better received.

• Don't try to get them to understand - Instead, understand where they are and spend time in that context. The more you make someone feel like they are mistaken, the more defensive they get. So be creative in putting up no opposition to what they think/believe/feel.

• Reframing and Reflecting - Taking their observations and reflecting them back for confirmation and discussion makes for a good connection.

• Casual Fact Dropping - Mixing in pertinent facts in a non-argumentative way can help keep a conversation from spinning too far off.

• Tell Me More - When they tell you what they want or how they feel, have them expound on that. "Tell me more about that." "What would that do for you?" "What would you like to do if you were able to do that?"

The only thing neater than having a local expert help you directly might be the ability to share it with others via a blog. One of the benefits of partnering up with a digital marketing company @town-crier, volunteering to help the community stay strong and rebound, is being able to deliver a Drive-By Beering© 2020 to the awesome people helping each other. Gift cards for 6-packs of some of the town's best craft beer. https://towncriermarketing.ca

Now is the best time I can imagine for a #thoughfuldailypost Stay safe and have fun!

I am honoured to curate for:

Link me your thoughtful daily post or comment with questions I can ask my dementia care specialist for you.