A Post About Nothing Published in the Worst Possible Timeslot
Well hello there curious bystander and welcome to my wonderful article about things I've yet to plan!
I truly have no idea where I'm going with this but pretending to sound excited by adding exclamation points should be enough to make you believe this is all well worth your time!
And now you're here because you pushed a pushy button.
So let's begin.
Good day. My name is @NoNamesLeftToUse The Writer/Artist Himself.
That's not my real name, of course. I like the pseudonym though, especially the full length version.
Sure, it makes me look and sound like a pompous prick but that's the part that makes me laugh the hardest. Where I come from people can still laugh at themselves after doing ridiculous things, then leave the situation with a boost in confidence rather than a bruised ego, so I don't mind.
I can't remember when it started. Many of you reading this now weren't even around back then, when it all began, so you wouldn't know either.
All I remember is feeling small during my first couple weeks after joining Hive under its previous identity, way back in September of 2016.
I've noticed, over the years, plenty of people joining in on the fun here, but having difficulties breaking out onto the scene. Always feeling small; then giving up.
I decided early on — rather than making a name for myself — building a brand would be ideal. The first step towards accomplishing that goal is to... make a name for yourself.
All successful brands need to be larger than life so I created a character who's larger than life, added in The Writer/Artist Himself part, then began acting larger than life, as if I knew exactly what I was doing, the whole time.
It's called: Making a Splash
Almost overnight, everything changed.
I caught on quick. People at the time were claiming the platform was a 'social media platform' but I felt it was more like Youtube's distribution model and an online magazine combined, so being an entertainer working behind a pseudonym was perfectly acceptable. How do you not notice a cartoon character mixed in with a herd of humans pretending to be people?
Some early advice I read in one of those bland 'how to be successful here' posts went something like, "You need to be genuine so people will like you more."
That was coming from someone labelling the platform as 'social media' and in case you haven't noticed, a lot of people on social media are, fake.
Maybe fake isn't the right description but everyone knows behind that charm, smile, perfect hair, clean house, children behaving, socially acceptable opinion; there's a bad day somewhere.
And don't even get me started on those influencer types. Everyone knows they fake it until they make it but getting somewhere involves creating a character then presenting that character as the real deal.
Where do you even go once you make it as an influencer? Many of those who do find ways to get paid in social media environments aren't actually getting paid for their personality, content, or what they bring to the world. They just grind to centralize eyes into a profitable pool so the advertisers don't have to work, then get used as pawns in marketing and advertising to sell products that have nothing to do with anything. A glorified door to door vacuum salesperson. Of course you'll sell more units if you don't show up looking like a scrub. It's like if the Sham-wow guy had to show cleavage and rental cars for two years before being qualified to sell absorbent cloth.
But I digress...
Social media and content creation/publication platforms are two very different things, but they work well together. Content creators and content consumers are two very different things, and you can't have one without the other.
Youtube found success rapidly once millions of people started sharing Youtube videos on Facebook. The good enough content consumers enjoyed became free advertising for the Youtube platform. That was back then.
The world caught on. These days things like the mainstream media news outlets and even every alternative news outlet depend on consumers who do all the heavy lifting by sharing stories to their followings on social media. You don't find the news story on Facebook or Twitter, you find a link that leads to it along with some outrage or approval ratings. Then those platforms/websites/whatever enjoy benefits like getting paid.
Content consumers sharing media in that fashion are like the oldschool paperboy, except that kid got paid.
This platform needs to attract those link sharing consumers and keep them here. Consumer rewards help with that, along with a steady stream of good enough content that connects to people somehow on the outside.
Early on I knew...
People don't follow stories, they follow brands like CNN or Fox; people don't follow writing, they follow writers; people don't follow art, they follow artists; people don't follow games, they follow gamers. So on and so forth.
From day one and ever since I've stumbled into disgruntled content creators on this platform saying things like, "I wrote 2000 words and only earned ten cents, meanwhile so-and-so did this, that, and the other thing; they get forty bucks? This place is broken!"
Some of those folks show signs of intelligence but fail the personality test. And no, this place is not broken. If the goal is to only attract one consumer with a sizeable vote, I'd say your approach is broken.
Plenty of people can write a science paper or explain physics but until you slap a bowtie onto a twig and call yourself Bill Nye the Science Guy, chances are not many will gravitate towards that work.
Explain some shit about the universe in a video and you might get 100 views. Neil deGrasse Tyson can cover the same topics and get millions of views. It's all in the delivery.
Millions of people tune in worldwide nowadays to watch rocket tests and flights and it's not because rockets are awesome. Elon Musk is awesome. He didn't just send a car to orbit the sun in order to test a rocket. That was all a publicity stunt. Most people can name only one privately owned spaceflight company yet there are several and they're all pretty damn good at what they do. As soon as you add that spark of personality and become larger than life, people notice and even the money starts rolling in.
Add personality to any product. It goes from a hamburger, to a Ronald McDonald, to 99 billion served. Frosted Flakes without Tony the Tiger is just Corn Flakes with sugar, and they're far from grrrrreat.
Anyone can record themselves playing a game but they won't be getting massive followings or millions of views and dollars; until they pull a Dr DisRespect.
Those blonde women who acted ditzy in entertainment over the years were actually incredibly smart. This is how geniuses operate. Paris Hilton's net worth is around 300 million and you don't make that kind of money being stupid, you just act stupid.
I could keep going and going and going like Energizer but I'll stop so I can point out the most important part.
I felt small, you felt small, all those people who quit felt small. No matter how big something or someone is today, what they all have in common is the fact they started out small.
So in case you're wondering...
I knew all that and did all that just to see if it works, and it did. Some trade secrets aren't really secrets at all.
That doesn't mean I think I'm anything great though. I hate my life probably more than you hate my life. Still feeling small but that's only because I want to grow.
One can only get so far here and like the early Youtubers, there comes a point when personal growth depends on the growth of the platform. That's common in this industry, everywhere you look.
Hiphop didn't stay on the streets. News didn't stop at local papers. It all grows as its platform grows.
There's still quite a few of us here who want to see a splash and not a splat.
"Ripples grow into waves so get out there and make a goddamn splash!"
That's what I'd say if I was one of those dorky-ass influencers, or maybe a basketball coach and there's two minutes left in the game.
Now I have to add pictures to this goddamn post.
If you spent the last few minutes reading words and staring at random images that don't make any sense, just know they did make sense and you weren't really paying attention.
It's Sunday. This the worst possible timeslot. I could probably get away with saying:
But I've already said too much.