Crystal Clear, II.
...continued... from [Part 1]
I think this guy is just a stand-in guy. I have seen a lot of instances like this in the past. I experienced it too and I saw a lot of it around too. It is obvious the two people concerned here have different ideas and vision about their relationship. Once the goal doesn’t align in a relationship, then it is a waste of time, efforts and resources; both financial and emotional are bound to happen.
You know, at the Oscars there are those who have been employed to occupy the front seats until the stars of the show arrive. That’s because they don’t want the hall to look empty on-air or TV. Once the stars show up, they evacuate the seats. They are called gap fillers and these gap fillers are well dressed too. Well, it seems the guy in question is a gap filler.
Learn to accept what is obvious. When she finally move on with whom she has been hoping on, and you feel heartbroken, she would tell you she warned you and yes, she did. Don’t let anyone downgrade the importance of love in marriage.
Go to where you are celebrated and not where you are tolerated. No one deserves to be married out of “no other option” or “out of pity”. Leave before it gets too unbearable and crushing.
Marriage is a big decision to make and you have to make it with a clear head. It requires a lot of commitment, sacrifice, and even identification. You might think the love would come during the marriage, what if it doesn’t? Love is vital and this is why you shouldn't settle for someone who doesn’t feel as strong as you. At least be convinced the person loves you and would show some level of commitments too.
Leke Alder said and I quote:
”One way to avoid marital trauma is not to marry someone who doesn’t want you. Don’t marry someone who sees you as a last resort either. You’re not wanted, you’re not loved, you’re just last available option. You’ll be treated accordingly.” - Leke Alder.
Love is a two-way street. No one can make your decisions for you but people can only advice you. Try to look into 20 years from now and not just now, and try to picture if you would want this kind of negative feeling to linger till then. Go for who care about you. Don’t hang around those who are using you to just pass time. Marriage is deeper than you think.
Be very certain and sure, then you can stick with it.
The End
Thank you for your time.
My pen doesn't bleed, it speaks, with speed and ease.
Still me,
My tongue is like the pen of a ready writer.
Olawalium; (Love's chemical content, in human form). Take a dose today: doctor's order