In the last 2 months, 3 friends have lost a parent, 2 East African leaders and none of their deaths were related to covid19.
The person I feel for the most is a close friend of mine who in this past year alone has lost his close uncle, his grandmother and now his father. It's in moments like these I have no idea what to say, had a conversation with him on the phone this afternoon and it went by as awkwardly as you can imagine. I really didn't know what to say, also he was with his extended family, and he didn't feel like talking.
I might go see him tomorrow depending on whether or not he's available. Seeing that in his immediate family only his father and him lived in Rwanda, now he's almost single handedly supposed to handle everything.
Pic is mine.
Everything including but not limited to, trying to get the body to Burundi so that the father may be laid to rest on the soil that birthed him, which isn't evident in these corona/lockdown days. Even if allowed in the end, it will take a considerable amount of days, a lot of bureaucracy and of course the expenses will skyrocket.
He's overwhelmed at the moment. We've been trying to reach out either to help or just to chill but seems he's not ready. I've heard say that everybody grieves differently, maybe that's his way after so many deaths in a short span, or reality still hasn't set in.
Honestly speaking, I wouldn't know how to act either seeing that so far I've been lucky enough not to have to bury a very close family member or friend, a trend I hope continues for the next decades to come. And judging by the fact that even when those I have had to bury we weren't so close and yet I would be at a loss for words or action, if I was in my friend's shoes right now I'd be a complete wreck.
This whole situation is heart breaking. I really hope we all get to meet this weekend and to be better company than I was through the phone today, and that we'll stop bailing on plans unless there's no other choice.
Life can be so fleeting. 27 years old and the memories I can actually point to would barely fill a 1 gb drive.
Back when I was much younger it used to confuse me when I'd hear my elders talk about how they'd spent like 25 years apart, being too busy notice the time pass them by, only to randomly meet or get a call from a mutual friend informing and indicating where their friend's burial being held.
What confused me wasn't so much the fact that death was involved but mostly how on Earth they could spend so much time not seeing each and not noticing. Back then a week without seeing my friends felt like an eternity but now, sadly I understand where they were coming from.
Life goes on and then it's your turn. Best enjoy your people while they're still around, give them bouquets while you still can, instead of when they can't smell them anymore.