I'm on a bus...

...and I'm bored. I don't have the usual social media outlets to release my wrath upon under such circumstances and all my credits on Word Domination have been used up, so here I am.

I did just post a video of a kid eating bugs on @3speak for your viewing delight but that doesn't seem to have 'encoded' yet so you will have to put up with a few written lines of crap for now and a picture.

The Details

The bus is the 999 bus company 15.30 service from Koh Samui to Mo Chit 2 , Bangkok. I decided not to take the bike down this time as the weather at this time of year is changeable to say the least. The trip down justified my choice as it pissed it down all the way, so much so that we missed the 6am ferry and had to wait for the 7am which got us across and home for 9.15am.

Not a good start as the monks, family and assorted others were all waiting for us to do the 'new house blessing' service...but more on that fiasco another day.

So the reason we are barely moving is because we are in a contraflow....well some of us are . This being Thailand, most drivers are impatient, useless fuckwits and as you can see , simply drive through the roadworks and then expect to be let in as we rejoin. I'd have just rammed the bastards off the road.

The bus is just a regular service, no tickets left on the VIP today so leg room is at a premium and we are all ...

AMERICANS WHO MAYBE EASILY TRIGGERED BY SOCIAL DISTANCING AND FACE MASKS, STOP READING NOW.

...wearing masks and one seat per row is not available, hence I am sitting alone, as is the wife. At least I don't have to listen to her bleating all the way home!
We had to 'check-in' when we boarded using the bar code on the back of the seat, although they are getting less strict about enforcing this these days and we all get a fresh blanket and a goodie box containing one biscuit and a sachet of coffee and a cup . Fucking useless cos there's no hot water on board!

And now the driver has just decided to stop to buy himself some Durian....we're never going to make Bangkok for 5.30am now!

It's now 21:37 and we're moving again. Hopefully the stench of durian will overcome the stench of the drivers fags.

I've just eaten my biscuit.....

The woman in front just managed to recline her seat almost into an airline business class lay flat configuration and in the process, pushed my kneecaps up into my arse. The lady behind has a baby, who at the moment is fairly quiet and who is obviously waiting for me to get 30mins of contortionised sleep but before kicking off. It's mother is coughing and wretching on average , every 20minutes. Time to test the mask.....
There is very little else I can show you on a dark bus except my blanket, which I might try and eat except for the fact the Aircon is freezing my bollocks off which are attempting to join my kneecaps in the warmth of my back passage.

Natty blue and orange blanket about to be unwrapped!

Well, that's it from me. For now anyway. I can't guarantee this will be the last you'll hear from me tonight.....if my Slow-mo 'Kids eating bugs' video ever encodes, it definitely won't be!!

Stay safe and sane folks, and stay off Thai busses! Back to check if my Word Domination energy bar has replenished.