Just a couple of pricks
Humanity comes in all shapes and sizes with just as many different personalities and behavioural traits; Good, bad and certainly everything in between.
Most of us understand and accept that what someone else does, their actions, may not resonate with us and we may not agree with, or condone, their behaviour or choices. Essentially we are all different; The same, human beings, but different.
For this reason, the difference between us all, some of the things other people do can cause us concern, discomfort, trouble, physical or emotional pain and any number of other negative emotions and feelings.
Conversely other people's actions can be uplifting, inspirational and more conducive to positivity and the greater good within the community called planet earth - Or steem I guess too. They...No, WE, have the choice to affect our own behaviour, irrespective of others, and to choose which type to deploy, what actions, and when. Just like we all have the choice around how we let that positive or negative action from others affect us. The power resides with us, the individual, to command how we think and feel.
Like all people, I've gained my share of bad behaviour from other people in life; It's largely been out of my control though and so I have a choice, the need, to decide how exactly to deal with it. For me it comes down to a few of things:
- Is the behaviour I'm subject to positive or negative
- Is it intentional or by accident
- To what degree does it truly affect me
- Can I make it stop
- Do I care enough to do so
After thinking about these things I generally feel more capable of making informed decisions around my own needs rather than reacting to the behaviour itself, which of course, I cannot control - Not without ending someones life, but that often comes with implications of a different sort these days...Pistols at 20 paces isn't a thing anymore, lamentably.
Typically the bad behaviour we are forced to endure from others is nothing more than pin pricks in the grand scheme of life...Meaningless pin pricks from meaningless people. We often give life to it by attempting to prevent it rather than simply ignore the pricks.
I am very much of the opinion that one can only, and should only, attempt to control the controllable's in their life, I mean in respect of other people behaviours and actions...Trying to control something that is out of ones sphere of influence, or worrying about it overly much, is a fools errand and as someone who is not a fool I'd rather put my energies into productive and positive things, not the pricks. Don't you think?
Have you ever stood on the shore looking at the waves crashing on the beach...Ever tried to control the ocean? Yeah, didn't work did it. Well, unless you're Moses I guess, and even then, who can really be sure it happened right?
Attempting to control something clearly outside of one's ability to control is never going to get you too far, just like trying to control those meaningless little pricks I mentioned.
In my humble opinion a person is much better to invest their energy into more positive pursuits, ones that are within their ability to control and ones that assist in creating a better (the best) version of life. I guess that's what the phrase I end my posts with means.
Control the controllable's and ignore the pricks.
Have a good weekend too.
Tomorrow isn't promised - Design and create your ideal life, don't live it by default
An original post written by a human
Discord: galenkp#9209 🇦🇺
Images by me, taken in the Art Gallery, of some wacky display...Loads of pricks right there huh?
To listen to the audio version of this article click on the play image.
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Every human with his or her thought and perception about life, some are introspected in the way the do their things while some people tend to be extrospected in the approach on thing around them.
In one way or the other, our actions and activities serve as a deterrent to other around us and not many of us care as long as it doesn't affect us.
But what do you do when it does affect you?
well, i try to adjust and pay less attention as if nothing happens
Yep, that's the point of my post. Pay it no mind, and move on, as we can't control other people's behaviour.
That is absolutely the truth, we really can't change other people, but can only influence their decision.
We can always change ourselves though and in a situation when we are receiving bad behaviour in doing so negates it to the greater degree and allows us to move forward more confidently.
Freedom of association is the key. As long as we can disassociate, anyone can be anything and it doesn't have to be my problem.
That's correct...There's a lot of talk about people's right not to be bullied (for an example)...But very little about people's ability to negate any bullying through disassociation...It seems easier to target those behaving badly, however changing that behaviour is a fools errand...Change one's own is easier. Getting bullied on Facebook? Cool, delete your account and live in the real world instead. Problem solved. (Just a generic example only.)
I learn to ignore. But some people will do anything for attention and validation. So Iignore more. Often when I ignore more, I get hurt still.
Getting hurt is a choice we make I guess and I know I've done so on a few occasions. Ignoring haters is a good way to go though. Makes a lot of sense.
That's one hell of an acupuncture job O_O
Some of those pin pricks can dig pretty deep and if they hit a nerve or a major vein you might have problems ;D
Just drive one into the frontal cortex...Problem solved.
That's slightly more than a little prick doncha think? :D
Some need it though.
Hello there @galenkp, hope you are enjoying your weekend.
Nice post and I try to live my life as positively as possible. I learned when I was very young to ignore the pricks, not say a word, just don't show your hurt feelings. I never wanted the haters to think for one minute that I cared a twit. Works well for me.
By the way, I figured out, looking through old posts that @smallsteps was your niece, I started following her awhile ago, she is so cute, beautiful child. I can see why you spoil her. hehe
Hey there. I grew up in a small town where I was a different colour than the other kids...I was mercilessly picked on. It builds character. So, the tiny, insignificant pricks that come along and try and impose their will on me seem like nothing at all these days. It's the best thing to do...Ignore them, as you say.
Oh yes, she's cute alright...Suck a smart kid too...She hasn't been posting much lately but my brother posts about her on his account so people get to keep up with what she's doing. I'll be there in July...Claiming some uncle hugs.
Based on the thumbnail, I assumed the first photo would have been you and @tarazkp naked.
Assumed or maybe you were hoping it was??
Maybe it's both.
I assumed that's what it would be, and entered the post with high hopes.
I can only imagine how disappointed you were...The post is really based around a couple other pricks and, lamentably, the images depict a wacky display at the art gallery...Still, with a good imagination one could still find fulfillment I guess.
Howdy sir galenkp! Great advice. Did you determine that at a young age or not until you matured?
Most of how I think and act has been gained over my life...And at my age I find it difficult to pin down exactly when I acquired a particular thing. Did you have something specific in mind when you asked the question? I wrote this post over a week ago and can't recall what I said, and certainly won't be re-reading it. 🙂
I was wondering when you decided that you would be wasting your time to try and influence other people's actions, that you could only control your own and not worry about the crazy things other people do.
Because some people NEVER learn that principle and are always bullying or mettling or needling or harrassing or arguing!
I was brutally teased as a kid for being the wrong colour...So I learned it at a young age.
Oh really! There were no other brown skinned kids in the area I guess, wow! That's tough but it probably made you mature a little faster.
I was raised in a small Australian town in the 70's in a family of mixed race as my dad was from Malaysia. They were only granted permission to marry here in Australia two weeks prior to their wedding due to the White Australia policy being lifted. Besides, I don't think it matters for kids, they'll find something to pick on...Glasses, being tall, being short or fat, skinny...Having long hair, short, being too white, to brown...Just about anything. I grew up quickly yes. I was teased and bullied relentlessly, but it built character.