The Notebook

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I decided to stay at the shore to kill time after work. The sunset is so nice and I really feel like staying. It has been a while since I had this carefree feeling. Too much pressure from work makes me feel like being suffocated.

"Hmmm, it's nice." In my thoughts, while breathing the fresh air that blows from the shore.

I look at the surroundings if anyone is there. But no matter how many times I turned my head to search. There is no one that I can see.

"Who left this notebook?"

I'm wondering with the urge of picking it up. I opened it thinking to see names as the owner of it.

"Please wait for me at the shore near the tree at 5 in the afternoon. I will be there to see you this coming April 29. Please be there because I need to tell you something very important."

It's written on the first page of the notebook when I opened it. I learned it was a girl because the name Rica was written below. I became curious who that girl was. I looked around and I saw a tree. I went there immediately but there's no one there. I forgot that today is April 28.

I went home while my thoughts were being bothered with the words of that woman. I want to return the notebook but I don't know who she was. I don't know how to find her because after searching on Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter. I'm not sure whom to ask since a lot of names showed up the same with her name. I couldn't sleep well because I kept on thinking of that woman. Something in her words made me feel uneasy.

Then another day has come and at last, I was out from work.

"Jason, come with us to drink."

My co-worker Jim invited me after our work.

"Sorry, but I'm not free today," I replied.

I didn't hear what he said afterward. I ran immediately to go to the shore to see that woman. I'm so curious about what's with her words.

When I arrived at the shore near that tree. I see no one stays there. I thought to stay longer because maybe she's just late.

An hour passed but still no one else there. I walked around the tree but again. It's only me, the person there. I surrendered and went home. I realized that maybe she will not be there.

I'm lying on my bed and time to read books to relax myself. Accidentally I glanced at the notebook and that's why I became curious to look at it. Suddenly, the wind blew even though I closed the window.

"I was there waiting for you for more than an hour. Why you didn't show up. Is it okay for you to end all of these? I will be back tomorrow. Please be there."

I suddenly felt cold. I felt my fur skin stand up because I know something's going on here. It's an uncomfortable feeling and I began to feel afraid. Even so, I turned the next pages and the next pages while my whole body was trembling.

"Please, where are you?"

I kept on reading what was written in the notebook. I noticed that she stopped writing after the 10 pages. I am now so afraid but I feel pity for that woman after reading it all. She was desperately waiting for that guy to see her.

"I need to to tell you something so badly" That's what I think.

The following day came after work. I went to that tree feeling determined.

"Show yourself, Rica."

I said it slowly while my voice was shaking. It was not a good decision but I thought that the woman who was writing in that notebook was already dead.

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A cold wind suddenly envelops the surrounding. I see nothing but I can feel my body is afraid. I became more scared when I heard a woman's voice crying. The voice is so cold that I can't explain. She is moaning and howling like a dog. I wanted to run but I couldn't move. I just closed my eyes and squeezed my fists.

"Have you seen Danilo here?"

A woman's sad voice asked me. Deep inside I was shouting from fear. I just didn't, to make the woman think I'm not afraid. Then I slowly opened my eyes. I closed my eyes back when she was facing me while floating in the air.

"Why are you doing this Jason!! You're such an idiot."

I said to myself while shaking.

"Hey, please tell me."

A deeper and deeper sad voice asked me again. The woman is crying which makes me decide to face her bravely.

"Please, don't look at me first. I'm going to pee here, I'm telling you."

I just made fun of myself to divert my fear.

"Okay," she just replied.

Then I answered her question.

"No, I haven't but what's wrong. I noticed you don't belong in the living anymore."

"I know but I just want to see him before I go."

I pity her so much that I began to have teary eyes. My fear left and what I'm feeling right now is sympathy with her.

"What's his last name? Maybe I know him."

I asked.

"Danilo Landers," she replied.

Tears pour the ground like rain. My heart beats fast like a thunder clap's sound.

"Mom?" I said.

The woman suddenly shocks after what I called her. She's crying with joy.

"Jason?" She asked.

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I nodded as my tears followed my nodding.

"How did you know it's me, son?"

"Father told me about you," I replied.

"My father knew that my mother was carrying me in her belly. He knew that you were so eager to see him because you would give birth soon. He just couldn't meet you because he was guarded by my grandparent's guards. They were against your relationship because they didn't want a poor family to become part of theirs. He wanted to see you badly but he didn't have the chance."

"He was released when my uncle told grandpa and grandma that you died after I was born. They pitied me as their grandson so they let me live by Father's care. But Father didn't overcome his sadness after you died. He kept drinking and always home drunk. When I was 7 years old he died because of cancer in the liver. He decided to ignore me because he loved you so much, mom. I just learned everything from my Uncle. I wanted to see you badly, mom. Even just a photograph but I couldn't because grandpa and grandma took away everything related to you."

I wanted to hug my mother but I know it's impossible. I'm like a child who lost his toy and only the mother's touch can make me stop from crying.

"My poor son. I'm so sorry for making you lonely in your whole life. But knowing you grew up a fine man. I wish for nothing now. It will be sad for you because I will be with your Father now. We will not be there for you. I hope you will still be happy by then."

"It's fine mom. I am happy to be alone anyway. In fact, I used to stay at the window watching children having fun. I'm not picky about food and I love pretty girls like you. Grandpa and grandma were strict but I always went home late."

I stopped for a bit because I felt like I couldn't breathe because of the pain.

"I went home late because, because --- it felt so lonely being alone. I stayed most of the time at the cemetery where both of you and father rested."

I'm out of words as my sobbing interfered with my breath.

"You know what mom. I miss you too so much. Even Father didn't spend much time with me. I still love her like how much I love you."

I stopped when my mother was fading.

"Wait mom, don't go yet. There are so many things I wanted to tell you for those past many years. Please don't go-,"

She came to me and hugged me.

"I love you so much, my son. You know I can't stay for long since I'm at peace now."

"But mom----," she's fading in my sight and I did nothing but cry harder. I sob and feel the anguish in my chest.

I stopped to make her at peace after she showed me a smiling face.

"I love you so much, mom. Please tell father to take care of you there and don't worry about me."

I shouted and she faded.

I don't feel like moving as I want to cry more. Even so, something inside me feels relieved and happy. I saw my mother and even felt her hug. After that, I visited that tree almost every day when I'm free. I also hide the notebook that my mother owned. It's lonely but it's not that sad like it was.

Thank you for reading

one image is mine if not being credited

mrnightmare