RE: Tall Tales: An Engage The Weekend Game

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3 Stories:

Number 1
When I was 13 I got a 2 year old half Arab half Quarter horse. She was a Palomino Mare and the Arab half was registered. She was green broke and I spent a year training her. When I was 14 we went to help a neighbor with his spring roundup. The neighbor had a kid my age who had a big roan Quarter horse. We had about 5 miles to ride to get back to their place in the evening so the kid and I decided to race home. My horse got the bit and I was completely out of control. She ran right through a 4 strand barbed wire fence. So with all the other things I've done to myself the worst crash I had was on a fucking horse.

Number 2
When I was a kid I shoveled so much shit that I was completely immune to it. I literally shoveled hundreds of tons every year. I was skinny as a rail, but I grew up one strong SOB. My freshman year in High School the coach hung a nickname on me that stuck for a while. It was a relief situation and he called me in from first base for my first ever varsity pitch. He knew I'd be nervous so he looked at me and said in a fairly loud voice "Pilot: Get in here and finish this game." Pilot? WTF did that mean? I asked him between innings and he allowed that it had to do with my reputation for shoveling shit. Pile it here, Pile it there.

Number 3

I was about 30 years old when I got my Springer Spaniel pup. The breeder was a friend of mine and when he bred his bitch he sold me a pup. I got second choice of the litter (the owner of the stud got first choice). I saw those pups on the second day of life when I helped my friend dock their tails. I saw them at least weekly for 7 weeks when the stud owner showed up to take his pup. I just knew he was going to take the big male that I wanted so I just hated going up there. He picked a really likely looking little bitch and I had my dog. Turned out to be my best dog ever. I swear to God the dog understood English at least as well as I did. Tough bastard, too. Killed a badger one on one.



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7 comments
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The problem with you is that all of these could be totally legit, they're all believable.

I'm going to go with number one as the porky pie (Lie.)

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I'll let you know tomorrow. I promise to have the results in time for your return to work Monday. It's the 14 hour thing.

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Damn Tom all three of those sound truthful to me. For number two what kind of job would a kid have that involved shoveling actual shit? You worked in a pig farm or something?

I say number 1 is fake. Partly because i wouldn't want a horse to run full steam into a barbwire fence.

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Those are all good, and I can see those stories all coming from you as legitimate. However... Number 2 was the only one you didn't really swear about, so I'm thinking that's the fib.

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So. I might take off a little early so I'm going to own my lie before @galenkp is up for work.

#2 is the lie. I shoveled my share of horse shit, chicken shit, cow shit and pig shit, but it wasn't thousands of tons, it was normal farm kid shoveling. I was skinny and whip strong but it was from moving water pipes. I wasn't a particularly good pitcher and didn't throw a pitch in a game until I was a junior in a blow out game....

That joke was pretty common when I was in High School, BTW :) Congratulations Victor!

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a

Wow so number two was the lie! I was fooled! Good job! I'll be posting thewinners inna few minutes including which story of mine was a lie.

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