Family Dinners and a Cuppa

in GEMS2 months ago (edited)


A family is more than just a mixed bag of individual people. It is something that takes on its own life and characteristics, sharing the most mundane to the most important things in your life. These are the things that hold it together. Anything that affects your family will definitely affect the whole family in some way.


Things are sometimes solved over a family dinner or a glass of wine and, ever so occasionally, even a cuppa.


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Some people believe that birth order has a profound effect in how you manage life psychologically. There are times in my life where I wished my birth order were differently placed. I am not the first child, nor even the third, but, I am the fourth. I never dreamed I would be the go-to sibling, the one who gets the drunk dials in the middle of the night and the guess who died when Prince Phillip passed.


I am one of nine children and I slid into this role, quite silently, almost like a ghost in the night. Perhaps it is because I am willing to keep up with the family history, medical, planning together holidays or events. We are all strewn over the globe, so it is a fun task. These things need to be done, because the strings of family are so easily let go without proper nuturing. Usually it comes when men take a wife. They seem to be better at reaching out to the inlaws and keeping things updated. During the pandemic, I organized zoom while we were all cooking Thanksgiving and opening Christmas. It was a great day and afterwards, we played Yatzee via zoom. You haven't lived until you try it.Big families have more personalities to absorb and sometimes forget about being tolerant of each other. Sometimes they get loud, so they can be heard. In the end, it is always okay, but, I am pretty sure smaller families aren't so loud.


Then again, some days, you just gotta be heard.


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I can say that every person in my family feels the same way. If you need me, I'll be there. Sometimes they come in the middle of the night, never to be seen or heard, but, to leave something. My one brother, who is my Irish twin, used to drive trucks for a short time. He would call me when he was within 100 miles of where I lived and I would go out to meet him to have a cup of coffee. Thirty minutes or less and he would be back on the road. It made me feel loved.


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I will be the first to say that families can be the biggest thorn on your side if they put their mind to it. They are also the same people who you will call out to when things are great or terrible.I don't have a perfect family, but, they have become perfectly perfect to me. And I love them to pieces.

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Little gifts of love, big problems dumped at the dinner table... Devoted and honorable. It's more than I could ask for. The rest of the dust, I just sweep under the carpet, right where it belongs.


Do you have a large family or small? Do you live close or far and what is the best thing about your family? I don't want to hear the worse, that should be under the carpet.


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All I have are my words, armed in my mind, written in pen, stand by stand. Oh, yes. Still by hand. It has a different feel. Altered not by keys, backspace, and delete, I write, erase, tear it to pieces and start all over again. And again.


It’s my way. I walk out to the deep end of the page and dive right in.

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One of the sad parts of being an only child that is older is, before long you realize you are totally on your own. Which for me that is fine because I am used to doing things solo. I guess in the end, we all grow according to our containers.

Perhaps, or maybe it is just different. I am used to throngs of people from growing up that way and you prefer to be in a quieter setting.

I think you are right to a certain degree about growing according to our containers, but, many people bust out of the mold when they go off on their own and for me, school.

I always wanted to be an only child growing up!! :))

Well being an only child does have some advantages. I learned how to fend for myself. Plus I got all the Christmas gifts :D

Oh, yes! The gifts!!! I didn't need to fend for myself. I have six brothers. :))

About the family. I know you have a big family and I'm glad you have such feelings for everyone else. The story of your Irish brother is really a movie scene. A meal with a large family is noisy but also very emotional.
My family is smaller. In Romania only our grandparents had 8-10 brothers and sisters, slowly, slowly it came to only one child per family, which led to smaller and smaller families.
We try to keep the tradition of the family gathering for Christmas and Easter, always a joy.

I have to say, I have always loved having a big family, but can also see the joys of having a small family too, for more individualized attention. While I never felt a lack of attention, it is easy to see how one child would get much more.

So there are tradeoffs all the way! I am glad you keep the traditions of the family gathering! Hi, Dan! @bluemoon

Hi, Denise, wish you a nice weekend!

You too, Dan!! @bluemoon

This is beautiful, Denise. You're such a good writer. It made me sad in a way because I'm from a very small family spread out over great distances, and of course unable to see each other these days... but I'm happy for you and I can see why you're the go-to sibling! Much love :-)

We zoom for the most part! But we did an undercover meetup ;)) Small families are good too though. Big families get in each others business. :))

Im so happy you are back! Love!

Thanks for sharing, @dswigle.
I got teary-eyed...
maybe because you wrote beautifully...
maybe because you made me miss my family.
Your family is indeed perfectly perfect for you!

Awww! You are so sweet and I wrote off the top of my head and didn't proofread it because if I did, I would tear it apart and change it. So, I hit post.

I miss my family every day. I'm so glad you stopped by and left your caring words. xoxo

You made me bake a chocolate cake, sweet @dswigle!!!!

Moi??? :)) Good deal!!! That sound delicious!

I am from a medium sized family. Not sure what category you would assign it. I am the middle of 5 children. We were raised in a somewhat traditional fashion and although I had the normal childhood / teenaged growing up angst, all in all it was great.

I had some of the classic middle child syndrome views and experiences, but while I was living it, I didn't know anything about that and it was very real. I only read about it in my early twenties and it gave me pause. How on this earth can birth order cause similar feelings and perceptions?? No matter, I still lived it !

As an adult, I have always thought about how lucky I was to be born into the family that I was. We are very lucky, because among us there are no advantage takers and like your family, we always know that if times go wrong, the others are there for us.

I've always pictured it as a safety net of sorts, in that it gave me courage to go out and do things, knowing I could never fall quite all the way down.

Growing up I thought most everyone was nearly like us, but I didn't get very old before I started becoming aware and hearing the stories and found that we might be more of the exception instead of the rule.

God.... and my family..... my two most important things. :)

Middle child! I always wanted to be something. I wasn't the oldest or youngest or middle. I was just fourth.

I always thought all families were like mine and was surprised when I went to school and found they weren't. My mom was a stay-at-home mom, much like so many were, and learned not everyone's mother was home, or made family dinners. I had kids eating dinner at my house on school nights (in middle school) because there wasn't dinner being made at their house.

I could go on and on, but, the fact is, I am with you sister... God and family. How can you get better than that? Thanks for stopping by and leaving your words. xoxo Have a great night!

You are very lucky to have a loving and understanding families; and you are the important bolt to hold everyone together as one big hive of busy people. People who have no siblings will have to build their own families of kindred spirit among friends. It’s the feeling of being a family that is very important to make a warm and loving hive.

Best.

I did forget to add that because I have people in my life that are as close as family. As a matter of fact, they are included in everything family. So, yes. Family can be defined in so many different ways.

Good morning from here @kaminchan!

🙏😻😻😂🙏🐈🐈

XOXO

I don't have a perfect family, but, they have become perfectly perfect to me. And I love them to pieces.

I couldn't agree more with you on this. Each of us are a jigsaw puzzle to our family. Somedays, we fit alright while others because of the rain, the puzzle expands and no matter how hard we try to put it together, it just doesn't. It takes a while to dry up on its own and eventually will fit in just well.

Totally agree. We are human and being close, sometimes takes for granted that all will be forgiven. It usually is, but, some things take a while to fit again.

Thanks so much for your thoughts and how is your visit??? :))

I have a family that are more like strangers, we've never liked each other and havent spoken for over 25 years. If you have a family where they all want the same thing then your very lucky. I might as well be an orphan, parents i disowned and 3 sisters 1 brother who are not welcome. Sad really,

That is so sad, but, you aren't the first person that has told me this.

Family isn't necessarily those born into a group, but, can be people that feel like sisters or brothers do. I have people in my life that are as close as family. As a matter of fact, they are included in everything family. So, yes. Family can be defined in so many different ways.

I don't love everything about my family, but, I have accepted some of the things I didn't think I could.

Hey, Karen! I hope you have a wonderful day! xo

Thank you and you😊

❤️

How do you do this?

You posted this 1 hour ago, and you already received comments, including a book-sized one.
Most people do not (or rarely) get comments.
Is there any secret, besides having a lot of Hive Power?
Please do not tell me to interact with others, because I am already doing it, and it does not work. Probably because I currently have low amount of Hive power, and most of the people are trying to get the attention of people, who have high amount of Hive power.

I posted a movie review approximately also 1 hour ago (I spent hours and hours on the writing), and I even promoted it, but no one cares about it so far.

I have interacted with these same people when I had 50 hive power. Nothing has changed at all. The only thing I can say is that I have always tried to interact with people and I have no expectations. I have posted for $0.03 and I have posted for much more. I do not promote any of my posts.

I cannot help if I have a little Hive Power. I have actually worked pretty hard to get it, without the aid of bid bots or vote-buying. Not sure what to tell you. I have no secrets.

Then I guess that I mostly interact with the wrong people then.
People used to ignore my posts, no matter what I post, what I do, what I write about. People usually ignore even my giveaways/contest. Recently I got 3 people to participate in a Dark Energy Crystals (DEC) giveaway/contest in 5 days.
But the real, human comments are rare.
Maybe I start writing only for myself, and I simply forget about the almost non-existent social part of this blockchain.
To be honest, it is very disappointing. Especially after almost 4 years of trying (since 2017.05.17).

I still say to interact. Its the only answer I have for you. Make shorter post that dont take hours and go out and interact.

Good luck to you!

This is funny, because nowadays I usually write short posts, and some people say that I should write longer posts, and put the work and effort in them, but when I do that, people still ignore my posts. I am slowly coming to a conclusion that it is not worth to post anything for the audience. The audience probably does not even exists. And this is not just/only me. 90% of the Hive blockchain users write posts, but not (or rarely) comments.

👍

Siblings are the bond of a family to closely them met together, they are connecting family members and ensure reunion of every family. Have a good time your family.

Family is more important and they are respectively engage your life, support, help and many more in the connections. Have a great day with all of your family and their memorial.

👍