So for a while now I have been processing this particular thingy with the hope that it was going to come out successful. I had quite a number of requirements I needed to meet which I tried to meet anyway. I hoped, prayed and tried as much as I could to have a positive mind towards the outcome....I was almost sure I had gotten it.
Then came the waiting period....this time I had to wait for a response. A response that would either crown it all a success or make a mess of it all. I waited, I hoped, I wished, I prayed for some sort of a miracle even if I may not merit it.
If there is something I don't like doing, it is waiting. It makes me feel so nervous and scared, it makes me over worry and possibly think the worst to come. But then some of the things you want in life would make you wait till you learn to be patient. And so I waited....
Today I wish waiting granted success or a positive response. Today my waiting was proven to be futile "this time". Now I feel like I have been put on the spot and my life paused. What do I do now? What next moving forward?
Planning is one thing until life decide to show you who is boss. Well, the good thing is when there is life there is certainly hope. I am going to try again because I really need this, I feel hurt but I have to try again. I wish I can find help though but we are in a world where some people think everyone is just a gold digger looking for who to prey on.
I want to scream help and tell them that I am not like that....I am not ungrateful, I just want a good life for myself and family. Hell yes, who doesn't want a good life right?
This is a life rant from a broken heart who just got a "not great" news about something she has been waiting on.