When Hope Fades

Each and every one of us has challenges we're dealing with, although they might differ and hold weight depending on the individual and what they're facing. That one is rich doesn't mean their life is perfect, so it's always surprising when I see people play down a rich man's outcry of going through one challenge or the other. While it's understandable that everyone goes through difficult times, I still can't help but wonder where everyone turns to when all hope seems lost or when the challenge has pushed us to the wall. Do we just give up, call for help, or strive to sail through such on our own?

Taking either of the two highlighted steps above could go on to bring about success, while the first, although it might render immediately, might be followed by something disastrous and regrettable. On most occasions I do envy the majority of people around me who have different people they can call on during tough times. Yes, it might seem wrong to envy others, but the fact remains that I do envy them. Sometimes it's a friend who's going through one difficulty or another, and before you know it, when they call their parents, uncle, or friend, those people quickly render help, and I can't help but look inward to my own circle and feel bad that I can't get such myself.

Sometimes I wish I had come from a different family or had an entirely different circle of friends, but then I come back to my senses by asking myself if anyone really owes me anything. I mean, aside from the responsibility of a parent to their child to a certain age, no one actually owes me anything, including my uncles and friends. It's just that I can't help but make comparisons when a friend can call his rich uncle and relatives and they come through for him, while on the other hand, if perchance I try to do the same with mine, I'll most likely end up being the one who has to send them something because of all their problems they'll tell me about during such calls, and so I opted to keep my distance and take my life seriously so my kids won't have to go through the same.

Presently I'm by the wall; behind are numerous challenges that need my solutions, both financially and in other aspects, and while I've been diligent enough to give my best, although it seems not to be enough, and when I try to seek help, at this crossroads, I can't help but wonder what to do, since no help is forthcoming. Should I just outrightly give up, or just face the situation as it comes regardless of if what I'm unable to provide will bring about embarrassment? At this point I'm lost for words or thought and can't help but wonder what or how to sail through this phase.

I've come to realize that life has its way of presenting us with a test that's beyond our comprehension. While some people are lucky enough to have people they can run to and lean on, others like me must learn to stand firm even in the face of such an unbearable circumstance. To be honest, it's not easy, because I've on several occasions felt lost and unsure of how to proceed, but most importantly, I've learned that giving up is never an option, so even though the help I desperately need isn't coming from those around me, I guess I'll have no choice but to seek it from within. Hopefully one day I'll look back and smile, because the pains and struggles of today will have become a story of survival worth telling.

All photos are mine.