Well that was fast
I set a record!
First of all, I want to thank everyone who shared their 'first week/month on the job' experiences with me! It helped me put things into perspective. That being said...
Alright, from the top. A few months ago, I found a job opening which seemed to hold a good challenge for me while still holding some familiar territory. I was still recovering from being overworked (although, let's call it for what we discovered it definitely was now: A big, fudging burnout. Again). I wanted this job, so I applied, but told them I had to take a few months to recover first. I got those months and took things slow. By the end of it, I felt good, I felt ready! I was excited about the job and started it a week ago on monday. Filled with good hope.
By the end of monday, I had a headache and was tired as heck.
Tuesday, second chance. I could not concentrate most of the day and by the end of it, I started wondering if this was 'normal', or if it was more than just the 'stress of a new job'.
Thursday then! Third time's the charm, right? No. Full head, no concentration and by the end of that day, I was wondering what the heck I had gotten myself into.
Weekend came and I talked with mum and hubby about this. I thought and I thought and by the end of it, I was kinda sure it was more than just the new job stress thing.
Then it was monday. Today. I went to work again. Tried my best again. Managed to concentrate some of the time and read a bit, but still, my head felt full. Cloudy. Dizzy. In the afternoon I had a chat with my boss and told her everything. She wasn't surprised and had basically seen me regress by the end of the first day.
We talked a bit, but both agreed I wouldn't be able to get there anytime fast, even if she gave me some extra help. We both believed in my abilities, but my head's just not working right. Basically, that 'overworked' (big, fat burnout) thing from my last job hit me harder than I ever realised.
So! After day four, I'm jobless again! Fastest they'd seen.
Hey, atleast I'm good at something!
I will now proceed to prohibit myself from looking at any kind of job offers. LinkedIn e-mails are OFF and I'm going to try my best to give myself a big, fat break for the rest of this year. Which is so very hard for me, because I feel like I should do something. I'm already wondering what the heck I'm supposed to do with the rest of my life, given that my brain is the thing I've always managed to depend on most.
For now, I'm going to have to try and let it all go. Take it easy, do things I enjoy and relax. I hope I'll manage and I'm sure hubby and mum will be reminding me.
Atleast there's one upside...: All the time in the world for New World!
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Oh hey, that's a darn shame.
I think you are right and that you will have to defo make sure you are recovered from the past burnout and be ready in yourself to take on the next thing before you jump in.
Just take some time to chill. Sounds like you have good people around you :0)
Thanks! Yeah, I'm very lucky with the people around me :D
I guess I'm going to have to accept some hard truths and work my way up from there. After I take some time to relax :-)
Yep, that was quick. I had my fingers crossed for you, but burnout is far more of a lingering thing than we give it credit for.
My ex worked as a senior engineer in the IT industry, a job that was both demanding and fast paced, AND somewhat abusive, and she quit in July (didn't go back after the holidays) and did not start another full-time job till March, 21 months later.
Just give yourself some time and don't be too hard on yourself... this was NOT a "failure!" I'm glad you have good support!
Ouch, that certainly puts things in perspective.
Thanks for the encouraging words @denmarkguy! It's a rough situation to be in, but there's plenty to learn from it. I'm going to try to take better care of myself this time around and one way to do that is to not look at other jobs for the rest of this year. Don't want to be tempted again.
Yay! 🤗
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Well even though that was quick, I was genuinely tempted to do the same, working in a company comes with a lot of unnecessary stress.
You should totally relax, you are important first of all.
Thank you @khaleesii! It's hard to find a job to enjoy and one without stress. A little stress isn't bad, but it needs a good balance. I do hope you have that or will find it soon! You're right, you're important first of all.
Thank you so much.
I can't deny I enjoyed the read if I didn't skim one word, that was pleasant. Is fudging an adjective in the Netherlands or is that a verb? I would ask you to use it in a sentence but that didn't get me anywhere the first time.
This part's serious. Really, I'm serious. Would you say you have "brain fog" and is it something you're certain you attribute to your previous work or do you think it's something else? Serious. I won't continue until you respond.
💖
Oh hi there! Well you know, fudging is just a kinder alternative, so I can swear without swearing! I think I got that little gem from Dean in Supernatural.
Brain fog is the right term I think! I am quite familiar with it by now, but it is usually to do with work. It's crazy, because now that I'm gaming a lot, it's not even really there much. Hench the me thinking I feel much better thing! I think the job was just too much too soon. It was kind of a big one and I had no clue where to even start with it. I guess I froze. And seeing the applications got me thinking I might not even like IT anymore.
Right now, it's no jobs for the rest of the year and after that, I'm thinking I might feel more comfortable starting in a less demanding position. Start 'low' and work my way up. And maybe something non-IT related for a change. Bah, IT!
Funny how two days later, I got contacted about yet another job offer in IT. Ugh. Can't fall for that again.
Well good for you, you owe it to yourself. Only thing better would be to take next year off too.
Pura experiences that stuff but it's attributed to her pancreatitis, glad that's not your reason.
https://img.discogs.com/Pfv1HxiU0yDpOkngpLjXxZQiKOo=/fit-in/600x602/filters:strip_icc():format(jpeg):mode_rgb():quality(90)/discogs-images/R-660840-1458064434-4337.jpeg.jpg