I'd Like to Take This Moment to Apologize For My Face

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(Edited)

Good morning even if it is the afternoon.  It's so nice to see you again.

If you're unaware or simply have something against reading account names before clicking a post here on Hive, my name is @NoNamesLeftToUse The Writer/Artist Himself.

I'm the type of guy that pops in from time to time to write an article and for some reason that makes a lot of people happy, some angry, but most don't care.  Totally normal.

Unfortunately I have bad news today and it has to do with my face.


NoNamesLeftToUse - Name Tag.png

I Knew This Day Would Come

Cancel culture.

Apparently my face offended some people and I've come to learn my face is holding everyone back from achieving all things glorious in life.

I never intended to offend anyone and it didn't even occur to me my face was holding so many down.

Saw the markets crash a bit there, again.  Of course those ripples eventually hit our shores here on Hive and all I could think about was how my face is most likely to blame.

I am so ashamed of this:


NoNamesLeftToUse - Yorr Ragrets.png

Of course, now I know better.

I also know that's ridiculous, I'm being ridiculous, and I won't be apologizing for shit.

It took a lot of years to be able to create, entertain, attract good people to the work so they can enjoy it and I can enjoy their company; make an impact.

Some of the best days of my life were spent here, doing my thing; enjoying your smiles.

And that's not some Hive cheerleader bullshit either.  What you're observing right now is me using my platform.  Mine.  No different than you having your space.  Use it wisely.

Myspace used to be quite popular on the internet but nobody there actually owned their space.  What I'm saying is every account here is given their own platform.  For artists especially, that's pretty fucking cool.  The biggest acts in music, comedy; they go on stage but they don't own that platform.  Movies, games; well distributed but they don't own their platform.  Biggest names in Youtube and streaming; don't own their platform.

So if some disgruntled psycho wants to come along and start blaming the world's problems on artists — again — they start poking and prodding; chipping away at the foundation.  They try to knock down the platform or put pressure on it so it doesn't hold up that artist anymore.  Even worse is when they go around attacking those who support the artist.  But it's all part of the game they play.

I'm not playing.

Several years ago some psycho kids walked into a school in Colorado; shot up the place.  Driven by pure lunacy.

Within days Marilyn Manson was all over the news, getting blamed.  Did that solve anything?  Hmmm?

Who looked crazier in history?  Those artists out there performing that newfangled contraption known as Rock&Roll; were they crazy?  Or how about those people outside screaming about how the sound comes from the devil as they gather to chant and burn records... ?

Who looked crazier in history?  The Insane Clown Posse with their wicked clown appearance, dark humor, and holding nothing back when it comes to lyrics; singing about killing bigots with an axe.  Or was it the FBI that looked crazy when they labelled all fans of that group, "Gang members."  Meaning something like a Psychopathic Records logo bumper sticker would be enough probable cause to get pulled over and searched.  No different than getting busted for wearing a cowboy hat outside the country music festival.

Who's crazier?

So this cutting-edge technology propping up my platform adds a solid layer of protection between the artist, and these fucking crazy people out there getting their rocks off on being control freaks.  They can't get in between the artist and the lover of the arts and start fucking shit up.

You can try but if you're going to make waves, you better know how to surf.

One of the most fascinating things about freedom is not even being afforded the opportunity to make a choice, you're simply free to do so.  There's no master or boss or manager or anyone telling you you're free, you simply are.

People struggle with that concept.

Every time there's a problem, rather than looking at themselves, some choose to start pointing fingers and placing blame on others.  Then when that doesn't work they ramp it up and start knocking down the platform; they're own platform...

Six years of that.  Some used to call it Steemicide back in the day.  An individual takes one minor problem, or one bad day, takes it personally, and blows it all way out of proportion.  For several days, weeks, even months; acting like a tornado.  Spiraling downward.  Death and destruction.  Nonstop.  Then, finally, poof.

They're gone; blockchain and everything else remains intact.  They only fucked themselves.

I've tried talking several down from that ledge over the years.

What's even more upsetting is when these little critters pop up, encouraging them to jump.  Every time I've noticed those clouds forming, I see them come along and spray their chemtrails on top.  They latch on, help fuel the flames.  Try to inject their own narratives knowing some of these disasters get a lot of attention.  Creating the perfect storm.

Nobody here is small.

And nobody here is big.

I think that whole crypto concept of minnows up to whales when applied to a social setting; all it's doing is fucking with peoples heads.

Don't feel small walking into this arena.  Even if it can be intimidating at times, you're the same human you were before you walked in that door.  There's no security asking you to strip down.

And don't buy the bullshit line of fear some try to sell you either, in order to make you feel small.  These humans, with money, are just humans, with money.  They're not big evil monsters out to bite your ass and rip your wallet off.  Most folks who could be out there flexing and being intimidating, are not.  It's usually someone who's convinced themselves they're small out there flexing and being a menace.  They always pick on what they perceive as, big.

That whole good vs evil, big vs small, left vs right, up vs down, coke vs pepsi; it doesn't make any sense in an arena where you're free to be in charge of yourself and that's it.  It's you against the world and the world isn't out to hurt you; it's what gave you life.  Can choose to walk down a path or make your own.  Step on a thorn; pull it out.  No need to sit there yelling at your shoes or demanding to speak to a manager when there isn't one.

Sometimes I think society forgot how to live like that; never learned.  Everything amazing is handed to us, taken for granted, and when there's a problem it's the fault of someone else; or so it seems.

Be real.

Navigating a blockchain social environment can be the most grueling task for any bullshitter.  That trail of breadcrumbs starts turning into a loaf of bread pretty fast.  Only a matter of time before they get sliced and toasted.

Don't even try to be perfect.  Just be real.  Making mistakes; normal.  Good days, bad days; normal.  Happy, sad, angry; all normal.  If it's coming from a good place there should be no need to sweep it under the rug.  Just be yourself.  Some will like you, others won't; normal.  That's life.  This is all life.

The good.  The bad.  The ugly.

Don't be afraid to ask questions.

Does my face have a name?  Yes.  Yorr Ragrets.  First released here early November, 2020.  Never explained in detail.  Just added in as a character to go along with some creative writing.

What else can I tell you about it?  He stands out from the darkness.  That's why the black color is in the background.  Sees clearly.  That's why the eyes are white and full of light.  Has a big red letter M on his head.  Red for passion.  It's hair; passion that grows.  Rated M for mature.  My content can be a little heavy at times but what I'm really doing is taking a shot at these control freaks and censors who like to stamp a label on your ass and blame art and artists for all the world's problems.  It appears dark and demonic; as they fight their reflections.  I've written about these things before, several times, several ways.

I put that character up as my avatar here the day I noticed some people were trying to cancel me.  Just to rub it in...

But that's not all!

Run for the hills!

Or face your fears.

Does creating something like that make me a bad person?

It's a caricature and the original context is linked, here, from early August, 2021.

It represents those who were losing their minds during a time of darkness in this world.

Everyone by now, I'm sure, can admit, while covid and everything covid related was running/ruining our lives, the world was becoming dark.  Far too much interference.  The people were struggling.  Some were becoming lost.  One of the darkest periods in recent human memory.

Darkness does not and cannot run the world; it runs interference.  So stop believing in that nonsense before you become consumed by its shadow.

Painting something that's a sign of the times is a very normal thing for an artist to be doing.

Here's the line that came before the art:

Demons being controlled by what they think are angels; on all sides.

At the time I didn't explain much else because: When have you seen a caricature come equipped with a map and description explaining every last detail?

That's not how this works.  That would be like a comedian pausing between each joke to explain everything to those who didn't get it.

If you look closely at the art you'll see a small being in the middle making up the nose and eyebrows then extending up to the forehead.  The arms reach out and grab what looks like horns, as if it's holding on.  It's holding on to something.  An idea for instance, or a thought; not letting go.

For that character it's actually holding something that only looks like horns.  They represent pricks; needles.  People were being pricks about needles, on both sides of the argument.  Clever?

You can see the hands.  That's the angel that's not an angel but some in the world were convinced is good, but as the artist, applying my thought process, it is bad, not good.  Remember, it's a caricature.  That fake angel represents our devices and the media tricking humans into enjoying bad news.  Constantly feeding humanity nonsense and distracting society away from what's truly important in life, like having compassion for your fellow man.

Several were at odds with one another during that time period.  I was annoyed.

It blends into the main character that has a big dumb smile on its face.  It's happy about viewing atrocities and being told what it wants to hear.  Big eyes, glued to the screen.  You can see how those eyes are glued to the screen you're using to view the art, now, on your own screen, and it also represents those glued to their devices; tv, laptop, phones, etc.

Now at the time there were two factions.  Just like anything; those for it and those against it.

For instance some wore masks and others hated them and thought it was stupid; some didn't wear masks and people hated them thinking they're stupid.

The art doesn't represent any particular side in all the chaos from the time period.

As the artist, applying my thought process, both sides were acting the same way.  It was everyone and the division was just an illusion.  It all makes up one unit, known as society, becoming demented, not noticing, and happy about it, sometimes raging; like traffic moving along a highway, staying in their lane, being pulled along in opposite directions in order to reach the destination known as nowhere.

Some people were happy if someone got sick because they didn't get the vaccine.  Some people were happy if someone got sick because they took the shot.  The whole thing about being happy in that context, is sick; demonic.  So there's the big grin.

What triggered the entire thought process was a man who was happy to hear my dad got a blood clot and said straight to his face with a smile, "I told you so."

Hearing about that is when it hit home for me.  Rather than sitting around pouting and arguing; I sat and got to work on something.

My dad injured his leg, put it off, didn't get medical attention.  One day his leg ballooned up, and again he put it off.  The injury caused a blood clot.  The guy that was happy assumed it was the vaccine that did it.  Forgot to put his media consumption habits on the backburner, snap out of it for a moment in order to have compassion for your fellow man, like things would have been, before the chaos ensued.  People were forgetting how to be human.  Still are.

As the artist I'm allowed to apply my opinion or thought process to my work, so I did.

That caricature shares a similar style with a few other cartoon characters I've made.  Here's Belinda:

image.png

It doesn't have nearly as much depth.  But that being in the middle is something like a parasite that latches onto its host, then controls it.  Very basic explanation and that actually happens in nature.

There you can see how the eyes are fixated on the controller.  The parasite is leading the way.  It's like a visual representation of brainwash.

Now

Should I pull up another demonic-looking being I once produced, but never explained, then sit here and describe how it represents a man, who for an entire year, fucked the mother of my kids, while she sat there pretending we're a happy family and hating me for suspecting something was going on, eventually pushing me into a drunken limbo, effectively destroying whatever I had left of my life?  Losing everything!

(Just being dramatic for effect!)

Is that what passes for entertainment around here?

Some may have figured out what I'm addressing, others have no clue but still learned a lot.  I don't need to mention names or throw anyone under the bus.

Please realize that is just another drop in the ocean; the ocean that is me.  All it does it make me grow; become stronger.  I'm also afforded the luxury of being inspired.  Some day I'll produce another image representing my past challenges in life, and not say a damn thing about who or what it represents.  It'll look like a demon.

I'll continue to defend freedom of the arts and expression on this chain.  Anyone who knows me knows I've been doing that since the start.  Why?  Because it's worth it.

Have a nice day.

Credits:
Art and images seen here were produced digitally, by me.
NoNamesLeftToUse Outro.png

"Too busy worshipping control in order to be controlled, better. Too busy fighting their reflections."

© 2022 @NoNamesLeftToUse.  All rights reserved.



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139 comments
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Very strong post, The divisiveness of society does seem to be growing ever stronger.

It was nice to read some of your thoughts.

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And it's all pointless, leading nowhere. Just a sick way to make money.

Thanks for stopping in. Quiet here today.

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How's the lockdown in Canada?

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Hardly noticed it.

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I guess freedom ain't shit.

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How you doing these days?

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I'm enjoying my time, when I'm not shaking my head at and cussing strangers on the internet.

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Good to hear you're living a balanced lifestyle.

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One gets a certain satisfaction from challenging nonsense, idiocy and all kinds of propaganda, exposing lies and speaking the truth, but its certainly not without a tinge of disgust and disdain towards the people which spread such things.

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Best to rise above.

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If you want to live in the clouds, meanwhile I'm fascinated by the dirtscumtrash.

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Can see more from up there.

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And from outer space you can smell my underwear!

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So that's what dark matter is. I thought those were just shit stains.

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Holy shit. Way too deep into that rabbit hole. Some parts I had to smile, while others I was kind of lost in the void you created.

Navigating a blockchain social environment can be the most grueling task for any bullshitter. That trail of breadcrumbs starts turning into a loaf of bread pretty fast. Only a matter of time before they get sliced and toasted.

Hearing people say, the blockchain does not forget, with that ill intent linger in the way they say it. Too bad there is no pub scenario in them being next to me so I can pummel them with a back hand.

Yes, real deep post man. Hope you are ok.

Are you OK?

Just give me a holler if you need someone to talk shit with.

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Can't kill something that's already dead.

I'm fine.

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Good to hear.

I'll kick it anyway just to make sure.

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I overdosed on caffeine and nicotine just to get this off my chest. And I still didn't say everything I wanted to say.

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Let that shit out and boot that cat off the ledge.

Gets popcorn ready for the show.

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It's all good dude. I'm not sure if you're aware what happened but I'll just say I'm not the one who has to live with it.

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I think I do, from a post you did awhile back, if I am thinking that is what you are referring to. But I will say its good to have your post grace me with your presence.

More please.

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Some dude fell off his rocker, created a fantasy world, stole art from members here including me, took that art out of context, and used it as "evidence" to prove his fantasy world. Using my art, and the work of others, to make everyone here look bad; evil. Said some of the most disgusting fucking things and just laughs about it now. Fucking liar and a thief.

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Dang, would love to see this painted fantasy of theirs and what they ingesting too.

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(Edited)

You're a family man. What if someone took your photos and said you're a human trafficker. Then took snippets of conversations you've had, saying it was code talk, and claiming that's evidence. That's his level of crazy.

You know how I banter and joke around with people here? One day I was joking about a piece of glassware. Dude took snippets of that conversation comprised mainly of ridiculous jokes, and said it was proof of satanism. Also claimed I run Hive. Even went so far as saying the FBI won't doing anything because they're in on it.

That's the level of crazy we're dealing with.

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BAHAHAHA

Like our animal banter?

LSD, they were definitely on that crazy level.

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Cherrypicked all kinds of shit that can be easily put back into context, proving how dumb it is. Whatever though. People gonna people...

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People are people indeed

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People are people. Coming to this realization took years of dedication studying the population with true grit and determination.

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(Edited)

Well yes, I am not like most people, I did my research to come to my original conclusion.

Don't worry I will include you in the article credits. Whats your name again?

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Great read of your thoughts 😎 thanks for that…

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I could have said more.

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Looking forward to more, I saw occasionally your posts and artworks… not that often though. But that’s ok. I’m not that long on hive yet, so it’s great to read more points of views and deep thoughts. 😎

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Someday I'd like to get back into this on a regular basis. But when someone comes along hoping to destroy you with lies, that becomes a bit of a distraction.

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Someday…
That’s tough and sure distracts from many things. Hope it doesn’t distract you from creating…
Have a great evening! Night time here… 🥱😴

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Art in its purest form is a beautiful and valuable resource to the world. We must be real and not afraid to express and ask. Yes. I truly enjoy this Hive platform and hope it will remain quality. As an entertainer of music and poetry, I can understand your perspective. But I hear a beer calling me somewhere. Cheers!

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If someone took your poetry out of context and claimed they know better than you what it means; you'd know they're full of shit.

Enjoy your beer.

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Glad you posted. The key point is this is your space.

RE that thing you were talking about Most the people involved love drama, some feel attacked, some think they are doing some type of chore, but you will find the same people in the mess situations over and over and playing the victim about it too, both sides feeling misunderstood.

Avoid the drama. Good to see you, I get your art is your art, funny that is a difficult concept. ART is ART.

The rest of it is of no interest to me.

Glad to see another post on the wall of nonameslefttouse

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There might be more posts!

The drama is dead. It bothers me what I do was spun around in order to make everyone look bad. That's all.

And yes. Those seeking that kind of attention aren't worth my time.

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Yay! Hope you get your creative energy back.. MOAR posts.

Glad you come and go, you've been someone who brings color to the community in a lot of ways. Sometimes things bother us and we talk it out.

In any case. Cheers.

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(Edited)

It's good to talk. When I have not been, talking. LOL!

This place is lucky I don't do video...

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I'd love to see what Yorr Ragrets looks in person, lol.
Your talks would be crazzzy, wonder how the haters would come with the doors wide open.

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I've been interested in doing moto-vlogs but there's a lot of overhead.

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Damn, I'm already in love, love the sound of engines...
What piece of contraption do you ride, Harley Davidson, Ducati?

Oh, the overhead, that's one thing to look into.

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The only bike I have now is Honda CRF450R.

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Nice, that's a dirt bike.

Guess you a pro on that...

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Just a hobby of mine since the age of eight. Not too many crazy stunts these days. The ground seems to be a lot harder than it was when I was young.

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You just cracked a rib here, you have funny way around words. Damn, I miss that a lot. Times have changed, certainly the ground changed with it also.

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Congratulations @nonameslefttouse! Your post has been a top performer on the Hive blockchain and you have been rewarded with the following badge:

Post with the highest payout of the day.

You can view your badges on your board and compare yourself to others in the Ranking
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I get it, I think!
and the artwork is stunning

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Just needed to take a moment and put things back into context, where they belong.

When I started here so many years ago already, back then, I never thought there would be a point where someone comes along to say it's stunning.

That's appreciated.

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Welcome back! Just in time to be cancelled!

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You are a genious. Good morning to you too. Maybe you are not a cheerleader but you sure cheered me up. I am even also almost inspired to create a witness node, but I think my lazy butt will win again, speaking of deamons. Anyway glad I went from the not caring banch to the banch smiling ;) people will keep coming and going like the sheep most of us are. But progress will continue.

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Nothing wrong with feeling good.

Not sure about that genius part though. Wouldn't you have to be a genius to figure that out?

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Hey! I was just yelling at my shoes and decided to look in here for help, and here's this! (shoes are in the other room now)

This last few years has allowed a lot of people to reveal their true nature. I guess the media 'deputized' these ordinary people, and they felt they had the authority to yell at anyone who went off the official script. It is sad to see the "I told you so" attitude, I guess some people just want to be right, and confirming their beliefs becomes more important than compassion. When I yelled at my shoes, it was just harmless lunacy, but these people yelling at strangers through the whole dark time were often saying "we know it's bullshit, but it's OUR bullshit, and we're sticking with it." The shrill emotion was just louder than any logic or reason, and being 'safe' overruled any humanity or sanity.

I better go apologize to those shoes, but meanwhile I'm happy believing that your dad's leg is ok after all.

Good to see you.

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(Edited)

I stopped yelling at my shoes and went straight to kicking stuff until I discovered I have toes. Isn't it cool how shoes and toes are almost the same word? Gloves and fingers. What the fuck happened there... ?

The whole thing, dude. I've always had trouble picking a lane. So I just did nothing, thought about other things, for the most part.

And my dad recovered from that. Still moving pretty fast too.

Really good to see you. Happy you came.

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Lmao, what happened there makes no sense.

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(Edited)

I can smell the evil a mile away from this post.

Joke, of course. Haters gonna hate. It's when they lie and steal that they compound the problem. Fuck em

The corners of the internet they gather will get smaller and smaller until there is nowhere for them to go but places full of people just like them. And that, well that is the hell they deserve.

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(Edited)

Yup. Living in a world where we must now indicate, joke, or they'll come steal your happiness, too.

Fuck the fucking fuckers.

And yes indeed. Like growing a garden of weeds.

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Perhaps we need a disclaimer after each amusing or jokey comment like the financial posters always like to put in not this is not financial advice

Ours could be

Note, the above comes under the category of humour and should in no way be construed as anything else

Still wouldn't work, cancellers gotta cancel!

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Maybe hiring one of those signer people that stands there and does that really exciting dance when people talk would help, except they could explain things.

Or some kind of translator service with a pop in ear piece.

Or maybe a laugh track. That worked for tv for decades. If others are laughing, then it's funny.

What the fuck is going on with this world, man...

It's like everyone wants to be Will Smith.

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A laugh track!!! Thats what we need!

It still wouldn't work. The laugh track would be in on it and it would still be a whirlwind of conspiracy and madness

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Yeah man. They'll play the laugh backwards. Instead of ha ha ha ha ha it's ah ah ah ah which if pure fucking evil being hidden in plain sight! Call the cops!

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More like the #FBI!

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(Edited)

#MIB bitch

Gotta have Will Smith in there somehow.

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I prefer BB (BadBoys), Will Smith and Martin Lawrence combo.

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What did you say your name was again? Joke. I mean #joke, not like you're a joke, I'm totally kidding. My name isn't totally kidding, Sirius.

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The name is Nobody Special and I just woke up.

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I'm Not Important, nice to be met.

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Hey! Are you related to Feels Important?

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(Edited)

And Felt! Oh, and hey, apology accepted.

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I think out of all the headlines I've written, that one is my favorite. Sweet

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That's a lot of words...
But I will reference from the very top, so you will never know if I read them all...

Myspace used to be quite popular on the internet but nobody there actually owned their space.

This is something that I wish people understood and I will likely write another article about it later.

When it comes to centralized organizations, they all fail. It doesn't matter if it is a business or a country - they are all fragile. However, if country ABC fails and becomes country XYZ, the cities and towns within that country survive, because they are owned by many different people and the general turnover is generational. Platforms have learned that by making people feel like they own their account, they can hold their attention for ransom, but they are going to have to take the next step, which Hive has already done, where people actually own their account, not just feel it. When everyone is invested, even if the name changes, it can still remain home.

This is a safe space.

Not a caricature of one, like the social movements and social platforms push.

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Far too many words and still didn't say everything I could have said.

Much like a city, if one house burns down (or if someone lights their house on fire then goes running around the streets yelling about seeing monsters), the city is fine.

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Yorr Ragrets. Sounds like Your Regrets. And it is going with the face. xD

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(Edited)

Yeah Yorr Ragrets is a play on the term "your regrets". The name stems from the flow of the original post.

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Yorr Ragrets, I couldn't stop laughing my ass off.
Being pissed off is so common among those that have nothing worthwhile, I'd prefer being pissed with myself but how do I help myself.

Damn, be you and as you said be real. I try as much to be real but end up getting too serious and lose my sense of humor so just get locked within.

Anyway, I love the thrills over here, don't give a damn what anyone thinks because it's okay to feel however you want.

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Yeah. If you're familiar with the chaos I'd experienced, the name of that character just adds a whole new layer of unexpected irony.

I did reveal near the end of the post here why something like a liar and a thief would set me off. Might be a bit of PTSD I need to work through LOL!

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I guessed I missed out as you stated some would understand while others wouldn't understand. The man fucking the mother of your kids, you got to a drunken state, ah,or I missed the point, lol.

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(Edited)

Someone tried to mess with me. I'm not a fan of that behavior. And for good reason. But I was just being dramatic there.

That's all you need to know. End of story. LOL! Done.

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LMAO, that's just the perfect line between the beginning and end of the story. Did I really care about the details?
Nah.

I recall my pop, saying to me, "don't allow anyone intimidate you."
I trust you did mess with them, lol.

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I'll defend myself when needed. Unfortunately that one has screws loose so its a problem that'll correct itself. Prison or a hospital. That's usually how it goes.

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Definitely you need to defend yourself. Where is befitting is okay to get it all tightened up.

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Your face, a face that launched a load of projections from another.....such crap. You already know my thoughts on that nonsense. Pretty cool face, expressive of your creations, or at least those were my thoughts on first seeing....all I saw was art, your art.

The parasite is leading the way.

Very interesting statement within your description of "Belinda", which I have not seen before and also like. Mind parasite...? There is more than one parasite I can perceive, if that makes sense. The one I'm thinking of at reading this and seeing the image, is the parasite that lives within.

Your "NO", hahaha, totally appealing to me on a personal level.

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The face works like a bug zapper. It draws those types near, then they crack, and I can see their guts. That wasn't the first time.

And yes that parasite can represent bringing what's being hidden on the inside, out.

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A bug zapper, what a visual, lol. I can see what you mean though. Ever get to feeling weary?

And yes that parasite can represent bringing what's being hidden on the inside, out.

Uh huh. Deep. Interesting that you see that, although not at all surprised, more wanting to confirm if what I'm seeing and reading is inline with what you're saying.

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When I'm drained, for whatever reason, that's when I leave to recharge and think about what to do next.

Haven't been home in awhile. Might take internet with me this time. Not sure if it'll work though.

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Thanks. I wondered. I never know what I might learn that is helpful.

Withdrawing from the world to recharge has been my steadfast approach in a conscious deliberate way since around 2013.

I don't miss the internet when away from it, doesn't really enter my thoughts either. Maybe not worth taking it with you for several reasons.

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That's the same year I hit the biggest reset button of them all. Started rebuilding, but had to decline just a little bit more LOL!

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Ha! Went deep diving down to the bottom that year and half of 2014. Short of it being that I crossed a bridge at that time.

I'm thinking that back around 2012-2014 seems to be a time when others also took a shift in direction. Decline is part of the process and sometimes a bit more demolishing is necessary before rebuilding.

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Some did, some didn't. Would you describe it as something like, no longer being pulled along?

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Absolutely some didn't. I wouldn't describe it that way, no. It's very difficult to put into words, so I often use some sort of symbolism to describe an experience that is not translatable into words.

Long row to hoe for me from the get go, difficult enough, but was the foundation necessary for what I experienced in that 2013/14 time period, a time when everything was stripped away from me, complete loss of any sense of self, a complete loss of interest in the world, not at all a depression, although several tried to say that was what it was (like I don't know what depression feels like, LOL), so I stopped speaking about it.

So fumbling around like that. To give it a visual image, like walking in complete darkness through a maze of caverns where you can see nothing, feel nothing, no sense of self whatsover. Yet the darkness is not empty and I knew this the entire time, yet on went the fumbling. Interacting with the outside world, other people, it was like being an actor playing a role, could clearly see that. Totally bizarre experience while going through this fumbling.

The only answer I would get from inside was to keep going, just keep going. So I did. Months of that until I came to the last thing I was holding onto, clinging, or perhaps put as something I didn't want to control of go. Final hurdle at the bottom. Felt like standing on the edge of a cliff then, the question being can I let go and jump, or am I going to keep clinging to this one thing I've held for all my life that I can recall. I let go, jumped off the cliff so to speak. Oh what a thing, what a thing indeed. Shifted everything instantly, end of darkness, end of not knowing what the real "I" is, dropping of the curtain, can't see the world the same way at all anymore since that. Can't go back and wouldn't want to anyway.

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Those caverns. I might have painted that a few times. Here's maybe one example. Can see the light at the end of the tunnel in that one. And maybe this would explain where my head was at when I was hitting the reset button. I don't talk about my life much so all there is are these bits and pieces; like a puzzle I guess.

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Mine had no colour at all, not really black, just dark with no indication of colour or even tones.

I don't talk about my life much so all there is are these bits and pieces; like a puzzle I guess.

I like that. Thank you for linking me to your posts. Far more enjoyable than my selecting what to read.

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Thanks for spending the time talking and stuff while I was busy trying to figure things out. That helped.

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Always enjoyable to chat with you and if I can help anyone in any way that's a big bonus in my eyes.

Again, been away, dealing with some things, working through stuff. Last three months brought things to my door to deal with. Finally feeling like myself again and sense of humor restored. Now I have to catch up with what I've missed.

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Watch out for the human traffickers at hivefest. You wont know it until its too late. STAY AWAY! Beware, traffickers can be women or men! They will act nice until they dont. There is human trafficking going on around this type of crypto. I have witnessed it. They literally have attempted my murder and are trying to kill me with V2K and RNM. Five years this has been happening to me, it started here, around people that are still here. Homeland security has done nothing at all, they are not here to protect us. Dont we pay them to stop shit like this? The NSA, CIA, FBI, Police and our Government has done nothing. Just like they did with the Havana Syndrome, nothing. Patriot Act my ass. The American government is completely incompetent. The NSA should be taken over by the military and contained Immediately for investigation. I bet we can get to the sources of V2K and RNM then. https://ecency.com/fyrstikken/@fairandbalanced/i-am-the-only-motherfucker-on-the-internet-pointing-to-a-direct-source-for-voice-to-skull-electronic-terrorism ..... https://ecency.com/gangstalking/@acousticpulses/electronic-terrorism-and-gaslighting--if-you-downvote-this-post-you-are-part-of-the-problem if you run into one of them you may want to immediately shoot them in the face. 187, annihilate, asphyxiate, assassinate, behead, bleed, bludgeon, boil, bomb, bone, burn, bury, butcher, cap, casket, choke, chop, club, crucify, crush, curb, decapitate, decimate, deflesh, demolish, destroy, devein, disembowel, dismember, drown, electrocute, eliminate, end, euthanize, eviscerate, execute, explode, exterminate, extinguish, finish, fry, grind, guillotine, gut, hack, hang, hit, ice, implode, incinerate, kill, liquidate, lynch, massacre, maul, microwave, mutilate, neutralize, obliterate, off, pop, poison, punnish, quarter, ruin, shank, shock, shoot, shred, skin, slay, slaughter, smoke, smother, snipe, snuff, squish, stab, strangle, stone, suffocate, suicide, SWAT, swing, terminate, torture, terrorize, whack, waste, wreck. You better fucking kill me.

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Of course, only your face is to blame for the fact that the markets have collapsed a little. It was too rare to appear here and some assholes decided that everything was possible now.

Everything amazing is handed to us, taken for granted, and when there's a problem it's the fault of someone else; or so it seems.

You're damn right. The consumer society wants exactly this from every adept...welcome to a wonderful new world... :D

Your Belinda is just a darling...it's a bull's-eye shot.
Yes, I forgot to say, glad to see you

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Yes, it's unfortunate to find out there truly are psychos in this world that would believe and even tell others my face is to blame. It's just art...

Nice to see you, too.

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This got me thinking of how creative one can be, most especially the art works. I remember loving art so much but my dad didn't want that, and I ended up studying Mass communication(which I love also). Well, that only happen to you being a Nigerian (if you know what I'm talking about)

Do you have NFTs in any market place? Especially opensea? Your work is great.

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I decided against selling NFTs early on. I might mint some locally here at some point. I made a personal commitment to keep this brand/style exclusive to this platform.

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This even make it more rare you know!

I like your idea, I have some NFTs as well, but not minted in any platform yet.

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I like the fact my potential buyers (market) already exists here, and they don't have to swap or trade a million different tokens just to be able to purchase. But much of my work ties together with my writing. Placing it on a store shelf without me there to talk just seems a bit strange to me. The biggest turn off from all those other platforms was the hassle of trading tokens, then paying fees, with no guarantee of a purchase. I've seen some folks spend a lot of money just to fill the shelves and ended up losing money.

Hive has NFT showroom. If the pricing was in HBD (stablecoin), I'd feel more comfortable putting something up for sale. Could set the price at 1000 HIVE, and that could be worth double the dollar value next week, meaning I'm ripping off the consumer. Or the token value could drop, and I'd rip myself off.

So many different factors at play.

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Exactly, I like your style, and about the network fess in other platforms are too much, let's say if you are to spent just $1k to buy an nft, you ended up spending double the money or more, and might not get All of that back in return. So crazy and f**ked-up men...

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Yeah. Not a fan of the middleman.

I like this system here where half of what I earn is shared with the people who support and enjoy the work.

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The feeling is different I understand! We keep doing what we love.

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I touched base with Paul today and he mentioned how great it was to see you. I didn't remember seeing him in the comment section, so here I am, realizing that the other post was not the only one you made recently- and holy shit man, what a fantastic post I almost missed!

My brother and I were talking about this yesterday, this meaning the underlying message in this brilliant stream of consciousness that I just read. My conclusion was, I don't like extremes, not in weather, not in religion, not in politics, not in anything. I don't like this whole If you think this, you must think this- because that's just not at all true for me. Sometimes I pick sides, but it's on my terms for my reasons and no one told me to. Most times I look at all sides and see things I agree with or disagree with in all of them.

Fuck these boxes that people keep making for others to live in, I don't fit in them and never will.

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(Edited)

The whole thing isn't the easiest to navigate. Never was. An excellent case study developed though throughout the chaos that was that dude's episode, and I learned a lot more. I'm not sure if you tuned into the entire shit-show along with the spinoffs, but I did. People will intentionally disconnect and allow themselves to get blindsided for a shot at belonging.

I've always said I never felt like I belong. That's a good thing. It means I'm not owned. Others see it as being an outcast, or cast out. They tend to struggle in life but since there's a group (groupthink) allowing the square peg to fit in the round hole, making the game easy, they're blind to the struggles they face; tricked into thinking they're winning in numbers. But really they're just spinning their tires and rejecting a push simply because they've already made up their mind the help doesn't know how to push the right way, beforehand.

It's also a gimmick and breaking character could spell disaster; friendships, community, market, money, security, comfort; gone.

The aforementioned potential fear of loss is typically what shackles a cult member to the floor with invisible chains; that's why they rarely leave on their own even while things around them are taking a turn for the worse or not making any sense. Plus there's always someone there to remind them everything will be alright.

That part in italics I wrote here.

And sorry for all the edits. I'm baked and you got me thinking at the same time.

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