5 minute freewrite Wednesday prompt *giving away power*
I copied this from
https://www.istockphoto.com/vector/stay-strong-believe-in-yourself-never-give-up-quote-typography-gm1281806378-379734530
This is my post for #freewriters Wednesday prompt giving away power hosted by @mariannewest
I knew that one day I would have to stop driving and stop fishing, but I thought it would be much later in my life. I have always been healthy and now to have all of this going on has really floored me.
For the most part, I feel fine. I even feel fine when I am having what I call an attack. The doctors want to run tests. I am scheduled for an EEG, MRA, Ultrasound and I have to wear a device for 2 weeks that monitors my heart. I hope I get answers. I have already had an EKG, an MRI of my neck, and an MRI of my brain. On top of all of this, the clinic wants to run a series of blood tests I guess people are supposed to have these done once a year, I can not remember the last time I had it done, if ever.
The hardest thing for me to handle is losing my independence, I feel as if I am giving away power that I am no longer who I was. I have been commercial fishing my own boat for over 35 years and now I do not have any say on what time I leave the house, where I will fish, how long I will stay in one spot, or when it is time to go home. I feel I have lost a big part of me.
I am not giving up, I know that I will get answers and that I will get my life back to normal. I will not accept any other outcome.
I keep my fingers crossed you will get answers but also get your freedom back. Being independent is important to me too.
I don't think it's normal to have annual blood test to check up whatever is needed. I had one a few summers back as I ended up in hospital. End of the story was after scans and so on everything is fine. I won't visit a doctor or hospital again.
Strength and love for you.
Thank you, until all of this started I have not seen a doctor other than my back doctor in many years. I would not be seeing them now if I did not feel like something bad is wrong with me. So I totally understand you not seeing them.
I understand you too but I had my years of tests, doctor's visits and looking back they never found anything or really cared.
I hope yours does and their will be a solution. 💖🍀
Wait, what? I have to go read some of your previous posts!
What happened?! I don't see where you have written about your illness anywhere else.
This started last year but in the last 6 months, it has gotten a lot worse. I started falling and once down I jerk like I am having a seizure, my blood pressure is now high, It has been low all my life, the left side of my face and arm goes numb and my vision gets blurry or at times double vision then the next day it is good again. The neurologist thinks that I might have a clogged artery but they want to run more tests. My primary care doc thinks I am having TIA strokes and says that the MRI of my brain shows signs of MS, the neurologist did not say anything about MS.
I'm so sorry ... you and the family have been going through so much ... two weeks ... just two weeks ... get through it day by day, one day at a time ... we're here for you as you discover what is on the other side. We pray it will be good news!
Thank you, even we have never met, your words really have a comforting feeling for me. #freewriters friends are the best. One day at a time. This is what I am doing.
You are in my prayers and I am praying for God's wisdom in your doctors to correctly diagnosis this anomaly. I'm extremely independent, and I don't like the idea of not being able to take care of myself or do what I want to do or go when I want to go. Prayers for comfort and health. I also pray for financial blessings for you. Thank you for letting us know.
Thank you, as I said to @deeanndmathews, you guys are my friends even though we have never met. It is nice to read your words, they ease my soul. I do not like all of this having to rely on others for everything. I will get better!!
You will get better, dear. Hugs! I also consider you as my friend. ❤🙏 prayers for fast healing.
Thank you