Mom, I'm Getting Married
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I'd be embarrassed for sure when this mood comes to an end. I'm like a young boy who doesn't care what other people think about me. All I want is to be honest about my feelings and not to be reluctant to release how I'm feeling. It's heavy. I'm jealous of what I always see. They are complete but of course, I'm not dumb not to understand that we all come to that. There is just that time when it's just hard to endure the pain of being left behind.
It was as if yesterday that we shared laughter. It was as if it was not just a memory but a reality that we are together. How could I forget puberty when I'm very thankful for it because every day we shared food and a bed in one home together? Yes, we used to sail in the ocean to catch fish and then sell when we arrived at the shore, or if no one was waiting there were neighbors who would love to buy the fresh we were selling. I admit that the kind of life was very hard but I must say it was full of happiness and contentment.
I barely remember my parents ever treating us to eat at fancy restaurants. Despite the fact that as a child we would love to experience amusement parks for entertainment we didn't ask our parents about it. Of course, envied other children but seeing how teary our clothes were compared to them we understood the differences. We cried and maybe we blamed life, I just forgot it but knowing the kind of attitude I have. I have a hunch that maybe it is.
I do not understand why I'm remembering this now. Why I got all emotional all of a sudden even if I wasn't thinking of anything. I was just thinking about my marriage preparation and it made me nervous and excited. Aside from those happy emotions, there is one thing that concerns me and makes me sad.
Sorry, Tay (father), I'm leaving home and will live with my soon-to-be wife. One thing that bothers me the most and makes me sad is because of Mom. She's old and feeling something bad she said. I hate to say it but brothers and sisters at home are not taking her well sometimes. Did you know that when I was home last week to visit her she hugged me and said she missed me. It was painful to hear knowing that I will not be with her all the time. But what can I do? She still prefers to live at home rather than live with me.
She was so happy to see me and so happy when I brought her fresh fish that I caught it myself because I knew she wanted to eat fresh food badly. I then remember how we were so happy when we're eating together with the fish we caught. Even if we did not have much we were still sharing the best laughter as we enjoyed the small amount of food.
Ah, it's painful. Sorry, Mom, I'm going to get married soon. I'm getting older and it's time to have my own family. I do not want to leave you far but I promise to visit you; Not always but for sure not very long because I'm always worried about you even if I'm far away. I know you are happy for me and I am happy as well, it's just that it's hard to neglect your situation right now. Even so, I decided to get married and hope that you will have a long life.
Thank you, Mom
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ABOUT ME
Paul is the name but prefers to be called mrnightmare that feels like living in the dream. A country boy and a dreamboy (dreamer) who likes to stay in a small village even though it means abandoning the future to become a seaman. The passion is writing but not sailing in the vast ocean. Don't wonder if the face will not be shown, this is better where the words can flow smoothly. Come, you can tell me your stories and I'll tell you mine. Together, let's explore the world by broadening our thoughts. If you need a shoulder I can lean you mine and I hope I can lean yours. The world is fun when living is not being alone but with someone.
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