The Mayhem Begins

I think there is a moment in every parents life that they know that $#!+ is about to get real. The first year is pretty hard and full on, lots of manual labour and tiring. Then the kids start to sit up gets a bit easier you can put them down abit and as long as your in line of sight you're good. Than they start crawling and it's fun, they chase you around abit you giggle and they tire out relatively quickly.

You figure out that if you do this at certain times you can tire your baby out realy quickly and they will fall asleep. Then they can sustain the movement a bit longer and you're looking for new ways to tire them out.

Then they get a little bit older and they start wanting to go exploring, they've seen the inside of the house for a whole year and know it well. It's cold and raining outside? Not a problem, I want out!

Stop watching me! They grunt at you as now they want to go and do things they know you will tell them off for. They want some independence, it's what you've been waiting for but that independence doesn't come with a broad enough understanding of the world around them. Try to get close and they will scream and run away. I once had visitors over and little miss used to love playing with the dog bowl, my friend calls out and said "I think your kids eating dry dog food"

I quickly ran to her, she took the opportunity of me being distracted to.... well... yeah. Dad of the year award for me. I spent the whole night worrying something bad would happen to her, nothing ever did and I tell her that story all the time now and she cringes and tells me off, as if I didn't tell her multiple times not to eat the dogs food!

I was recently met with an all mighty smack as I sat to complete some work, shocked I looked about but saw nothing as another blow came about and I saw a stick... Lil bloke had snuck up on me and decided to assault me. It's amazing the pain a small human can inflict.

Of course to him, it was the funniest thing he had ever done and immediately burst into laughter the moment I flinched and said ouch! He spent the remainder of the day following me around hitting me with the stick, pain I ensured because it was more bearable than the temper tantrum and the hysterical crying I had to deal with when I removed the stick from his possession.

Ontop of that he has found a new passion, when I am on work conferences he loves to hang up the call on my headset for me, disrupting me from my work. Most my work colleagues know it is him and he gets a reaction from it as they ask to see him.

He would once upon a time, patiently wait and chill in his pram with us as we walked now as each day passes he is less likely to remain seated and wants to get out amongst the action.

It's now that I know I am about to have a whole new world of pain not only having to handle the shenanigans of little miss and her pranks but as little bloke grows and takes on his own identity I'm preparing for double trouble.