Day to day, stress, work and problems prevent parents from having much contact with their children and when they have them by their side, they make them uncomfortable and whatever the child does, they immediately say: "don't misbehave". It is understandable that they are tired and overwhelmed, but it is necessary to calm down and dedicate time to the children, since they need your love and understanding. We must stop labeling children with the phrase "You are misbehaving". When children are actually misbehaving, they don't even realize it.

Labeling children with negative words and phrases is counterproductive, because it lowers their self-esteem and will not solve the problem but rather accentuate it. For me, this is a mistake because the brain fixes it, and then you will not be able to do anything to make the child have positive attitudes. It is the same as labeling the child as "donkey", with this small four-letter word is implied the whole life of the child, even if you do not believe it, your brain will assume that the child will never do anything right. In reality, children always misbehave or it is that parents have no patience and find it hard to recognize it.

If you ask them: what is misbehaving? And why do they reinforce it by constantly repeating it to the children, what would they answer? I consider that a normal, healthy child plays, jumps, gets his clothes dirty, climbs trees, breathes, walks, eats, runs and is happy. What else do you expect from your small children? From those beings who need to express themselves, to be loved and understood. A stage in which they need answers to their questions, as they are discovering the world and their surroundings.

If the child walks, if they are playing with other children, if they run, they are misbehaving and what they are doing is restricting their freedom and way of expressing themselves. Everything children do is not wrong, or would you rather have a child who is immobile and does not move and talk? OMG, it's crazy but there are parents like that. I have a friend who can't stand going to church because it reminds her of Sunday mass and visiting, where she had to stay still, thirsty, hot and unable to talk. Adults should understand that we are the ones who have sphincter control skills and children do not.

One Sunday like any other, when she was ten years old, she had such a strong pain in church that they had to take her to the hospital and put her in the operating room because she had appendicitis. And her pretty mother was upset because she had to leave mass. And the father finally spoke up and said: "no more Sunday mass, go by yourself". Negative events have to happen for them to understand that they ask and expect a lot from children. They are not able to understand what is wrong and what is right. Some parents urgently need to check themselves and go to a psychologist.

Many years ago in a mass celebrating the Nativity of the Child Jesus, December 25, and I do not remember the year, a lady who thought she was the owner of the church. She scolded some children because, according to her, they were misbehaving inside the church. The priest, very upset, closed the book and changed his speech. He spoke to us about the importance of making the children feel good and providing them with adequate conditions for their development. And he said to bring the children to the church because they are very uncomfortable.

Parents and adults cannot expect children to sit still for an hour. Instead of having a negative attitude, behaving badly and hitting the children in church, they should be thankful that their children are healthy and can run, jump and laugh.

Dear #Motherhood friends, misbehaving children are mischievous, they are restless. So they do mischief when they get upset, so don't force them to do activities where they tend to get uncomfortable, like going to the bank, a church, a movie theater, or any enclosed place. And where they must remain static for a long time and cannot even talk. Please, they are human beings. OMG, don't pinch them because they will start crying and it will be much worse.

Sometimes some mothers hear that they call attention to other children because they have misbehaved and they immediately scold their children and they don't even know what happened. They also label the children, this should be avoided because they will behave worse because you are programming them for them and you reinforce it by saying: "I told you so" or "I was right". The teacher and psychopedagogue María José Roldán, published an article entitled: "The dangers of labeling children", where she expresses:

Labels on children will not get them to change their attitude and the worst thing is that they will only make them feel limited and, moreover, belittled". For more information visit aquí

We must accept that life changes when a child arrives at home and we should not continue to act in the same way, children require attention and care. You have to learn to educate them, with love and tenderness, so that they can behave themselves. It is not to let them do whatever they want, but to understand and love them. Above all, understand that they need freedom to run, jump and many other things. Let them enjoy their childhood, be happy and free to act.

The phrase "behaving well" is a paradigm of society, and it pigeonholes human beings. Many parents consider that to move is to misbehave, and this is being intransigent because children who do not move are children with a disease or disability, that is, not a healthy child. I think this is food for thought, because you can't ask this of a child, because a spoiled or tantrum can be caused by being hot, sleepy, annoyed and tired. So the next time you use this phrase, check to see if there is something wrong with the children that affects their behavior.

"The most important mark I will leave on this world is my son."

(Sarah Shahi)

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_{Imagen capturada desde pixabay, propiedad de Adelkazaika}

Misbehavior is very ambiguous and will depend on many circumstances and everyone has their own opinion on this subject; if psychologists have discrepancies, imagine how it will be with parents. Here are some tips:

• Do not take children to closed places where the environment is unfavorable for them; with little ventilation and very strong smells.

• Do not take them outdoors when they have their naptime routine. Leave them at home.

• Do not tag your children.

• If it is necessary to go out with the children, run all errands quickly.

• Adapt to life with your children, this means that you should have toilet paper, napkins, water, towels, clothes. Also your medications if necessary. Do not forget to take anti-allergic, fibre and headache medicines.

"If my days begin with a hug from my son, they are far more glorious than they were before."

(Russell Crowe)

I invite you to participate in the activities of the motherhood community, and the healings on Wednesdays at 5:00 P.M. Venezuela time at Pal..

Friends of #Motherhood, you have to update yourselves regarding the education and upbringing of children, leave aside so many paradigms of society that are in disuse, and do not label children. Try to understand and love them. When you are stressed, take a walk and relax, and look for solutions with a new outlook on life so that you can raise emotionally healthy children. Remember when a child "misbehaves" it is to get attention, please check the root of the situation.

Thank you for visiting the Column Help, grandma!, see you next week. I love you.

Namasté

"We must teach our children to dream with open eyes."

(Harry Edwards)

Los banner fueron realizados en CANVA; las letras, imágenes y todos los elementos son de CANVA.

The banners were made in CANVA; the letters, images and all the elements are from CANVA.

Los separadores fueron diseñados en CANVA.

The separators were designed in CANVA.

Mi avatar lo diseñe en la app Bitmoji.

I designed my avatar in the Bitmoji app.

Las 130 mejores frases sobre los hijos.

The 130 best phrases about children.

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