The dairy of a Struggling mom Episode 1

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It's an amazing Saturday afternoon right here in my country so it's safe to say good afternoon my country people and happy weekend to everyone around the world. It feels good to be able to write again and I'm grateful to @hivedeb for her encouragement.

It has not been an easy ride for me, struggling with motherhood and my identity. So I decided to start this series of my struggle with motherhood where I share some of my vulnerability as a mother. I will try to always write this series twice a week and I hope and wish we all learn and be vulnerable together.

Today I would just like to share briefly one of the major things people don't tell you about motherhood and how I have struggled with it and that will be the fear of death I know this is not a common thing people talk about but been a mom has made me scared of dying young because of my kids, it's just made me worried about who will care for them at this their tender age and what will be their faith? Will they have the upbringing I wish for them? Will they have the kind of education I hope for them? It's kinda tricky when I get to that space. I am a woman of faith and dying young is not God's will and plan for me but sometimes my mind wonders especially when I meet orphans and they narrate how things changed when they lost their parents. It's not always a pleasant one.

So I pray to God almighty each day that I live long enough to watch my children grow and be with them every step of the way, get to see my grandchildren and bless them with the wealth of wisdom I may I gotten by that time.

I would like to know what your thoughts are on this topic as a parent are you sometime sacred of death? The thought of leaving your kids forever when they are still vulnerable does get to you sometimes. Please share with me in the comment section. I'd like to know!

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I so much love this particular picture. My older daughter was not in the mood for pictures while the second one was super excited about the picture, the reason for her broad smile. Two amazing kids with different personalities. Motherhood is a journey and I'm glad to be on this journey with this amazing cutie pie.



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4 comments
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When you talk about the fear of death I totally understand. Before Being a mom I didn't really fear it, but now my biggest fear is to die and leave my kid behind

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Thank you.i thought I was the only one that thinks this way.

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Just going through blogs and found out you are back...yeyeye. You are super strong.

This fear is one thing that I fly through my mind a times but the truth is I don't allow them settle. Seeing the trend of things I just pray to God to bless me with life to help them when they needs help as he blesses me with life too.

Anticipating your diaries

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Yes, sis.
Sometimes we don't ponder too much on things we can't change. We give them to the all knowing God.

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