How I deal with rejections

Rejection is a very normal thing that can happen to anybody at any time, it's something we all have to deal with at one point or the other, and where some rejections are light and easy to get over, others are very painful and the sad memory will remain for a very long time, but do you think rejections can be a good thing sometimes? I believe so.

I have had my fair share of rejections over the years; from relationships to social outings, and some are more painful than others but I always get over them. In my lodge at the university, there was a lady I tried dating 2 years ago and after trying to woo her for several weeks, she finally told me that she isn't interested in dating at that point and that she wants to focus on her education.

I understood what she meant (I probably should've taken a cue from her and focused on school) but that doesn't make the rejection less painful and not to mention that things between both of us became very awkward later on because we stay in the same lodge and always see each other every day.

The reason I said rejections can be a good thing sometimes is because of something that happened many years ago. After finishing primary school, my mom took an advice from one of her friends and planned to send me to a boarding school. I wasn't happy with her decision but at the same time, I wanted to experience what it feels like to live in a boarding school away from my family.

Getting admitted to the boarding school requires one to write an entrance examination and get a very good result. The school has a certain number of students it accepts every session, so their screening process is very strict. After writing the exam, I was very confident that I will be accepted but a part of me was skeptical.

At long last, the names of people that were accepted were released and my name wasn't one of them. At first I was very sad about it but later on, I was happy because I won't have to move into a boarding school and be away from my family for several months, I saw it as going to prison. I ended up in a regular secondary school and I'm glad I did because I met a lot of amazing people and I'm still friends with some of them today.

How do I cope with rejections?

One thing that helps to cushion the effects of rejections for me is that I always see it coming; I expect rejection to happen at any time. When I took that entrance exam, I was confident in the answers I gave and hoped to get accepted but at the same time, I expected to get rejected as well. This goes in line with my favorite quote: "hope for the best but expect the worst".

One thing that makes rejection very painful for a lot of people is that they never see it coming, they put all their hopes on getting accepted and they fail to think about the possibility of a rejection which in some cases is the same as getting accepted; it's a 50-50 chance. Whenever I'm in a situation that involves getting accepted or rejected, I always expect one of them to happen.

Like I said earlier, rejection is a part of life, and trying to pretend it won't happen will make it hurt even more when it does happen. That doesn't mean it won't hurt when you're expecting it, but at least you're ready for it and can easily cope with it. Think of it this way; it's the rejections you didn't see coming that hurt the most. So, I always prepare myself mentally for any rejection, it's better than getting shocked when it happens.

Thanks for reading

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