2021; My Biggest Growth Year
What if I told you that I got close to having everything I ever wanted and I was still miserable.. I want you all to imagine, if you got everything like literally every single you ever wanted in life whether that be money, success, a relationship with a beautiful girl, think about all of the things that you want or that you think that you want and imagine getting those things and still feeling empty inside.
That is the most depressing feeling you've ever experience in your life and i'm speaking from experience.. you see I've been through depression at the second quarter of the year coz nothing can be worse than the feeling of getting everything that you wanted and still not being content, still not being okay with where you are and who you are.. that is the worst feeling you can ever have.
If you've been following me for quite sometime here, this was my biggest growth year ever, I was close to having my first relationship; you heard this from me, I basically quadrupled the amount I had at the start of the year and I received way more money than I've ever received in my entire life.. don't get me wrong, all of the money made from here was used for a lot of things in every aspect of my life, not to be proud or anything but I still sort of felt that I didn't get to any length...
I know I felt like the universe was completely against me, notwithstanding that was my fault. How could I be deceived into doing what I had agreed with, it was all me and my perception was too reliant of things outside of me. I was looking to external things and it sounds twisted, How much money do I make?" How I look and how I would fit in with no money?" What will people say of me after spending all my money on things that don't matter?" Seeing my success on certain areas still made me question everything in my life.. My level of growth would be the moment I stepped into something I have never witnessed before and that became my happiness outside of myself.
There are a lot like me that will learn things on our own, I was one of those people and I admit it.. I was never appreciative and satisfied and grateful for where I was on my journey and then I lost the feeling of joy and happiness.. This year taught me a lesson, my mindset started to feel filled up when I got to start writing on read.cash.. everything changed, the Grace was that I could make myself happy by telling my story. Nobody never knew I had lost all my money and it was a depressing feeling, but fulfilment isn't all about money.. I could visualise my life changing and getting fixed more like healing as I became happy with the new things that came along the way..
I was scared, it made me succumb to a lot of things and when I learnt it the hard way...I started all over and I was able to constantly do what I was doing and I never took anything for granted anymore.. I chased the bag like how every one would pick up a batten and just keep running till we meet the next person and so is that person till another person is visible enough.. It wasn't easy at home either, things got worse and it brought me to tears. The things I never wanted happen, happened to teach me a lesson. If you want to have it all quick, you will loose not just your money but your sanity.. I was scammed, I was talked into what I don't even understand, I trusted people to the point that they took the little I had left on me..
Nobody cares about your insecurities, like everyone is more focused about theirs and if you keep falling out of whatsoever feeling, you have the character in you to calm down. If after you've been hit, let it be growth for you. One thing I realized is I thought people will say to me "This guy is stupid and so easy" but I was only insecure in my head and was limiting myself from breaking out of that.. So everything in 2021 was a stepping stone for me and I got to be better cause I listened and followed instructions.. it's not that I am that rich now or filthy rich with a lot but I am so pleased with where I am now. I was scared, I was depressed, I was lost, I lost the focus.. when I noticed that no one cares and then I acknowledged it, made me better.
For me 2021 will remain the year that made the most savings, it’s going to be a year from my past though that I knew so many things and learned new skills for the people I met online and my close pals.. What could yours be?” Do you feel the same about 2021 like I do?” These are just the good sides of things, the same year brought challenges like tough ones seriously. The first year I attended an online class 😅, let me not go close into detail to how hilarious that was..
The year is almost over and this is my best and worst part of the year and I hope and pray that 2022 will be better than all my preceding years..
Thank you for reading till this point, you are one of the very few that still appreciate my funny and weird writing.. I’m sure your Boxing Day went great. For me I sent a little token out to some friends, and it made them happy..
Happy new year in advance…
December 27th 2021
I have gone through such emotions and yea I do understand what you wrote. Rediscovering oneself is the next step in our journey of life. Stay blessed and wishing you a happy new year.
Voted on behalf of the Neoxian city paper.
"The feeling of getting everything that you wanted and still not being content.." Yes, many people can relate to this, myself included. I almost feel like you have to go through this step to get to the next step on the journey, where you start to understand what truly drives you and gives you a sense of purpose.