How would she Overcame a Long-Term Affair's Shock"

When something happens to a person, before they react, they feel something. What they feel depends on what happened to them.

In this post, I am going to imagine that I discovered that my partner has been having a long-term affair.

The question is, how will I react? What would I do?



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First, let's talk about how finding out about this would make me feel. In one word 'BETRAYED'.

I would have said heartbroken, however, I chose to use the betrayed.

It's true what they say, love is blind. I've heard some people say that marriage is an eye-opener, but based on experience, I have realised that love still remains blind.

Having an affair with someone, while deceiving me and making me think that we were on the same page and that we were working towards a common goal of building a happy home together is the height of it and a big disrespect to our relationship.

For Christ's sake, why have an affair?

Was there something you needed that I wasn't giving you? Why didn't you just let me know?

Instead you chose to deceive me into thinking that you were committed to our relationship? Why did you choose to break my heart without considering what it would cost us?

Why?



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A straightforward answer would be to end the relationship.

I always ask this question, Why lead someone on in a relationship when you know in your mind that you are considering other options?

Do you intend to eat your cake and have it again?

That's evil! How would you feel if you were treated that way? Happy?

Relationships are supposed to be built on the foundation of trust, which you know.

Now, that trust is broken.

What is the point of holding on to something when it doesn't care if you fall?

It is a sad and heartbreaking experience, no doubt.

In reality, I would take my time to process all that I discovered. If I have learned anything in life, I know that a person shouldn't act based on emotions.

If needed, I would need a lot of time to process all that had happened before considering if I should end the relationship or continue.

If the partner in question doesn't feel remorseful and continues with the affair, automatically, I need no one to tell me to opt out.

He disrespected me and all that we shared, so I should reserve what I have left of myself and end such a relationship.

If the partner feels remorseful and begs for forgiveness, and also promises to make things right, I will forgive him.

Also, because I still love him despite his betraying act, I will give him the chance to fix things, but from afar.

I can't just run back to him because he apologised and seemed remorseful, I have to see that he is truly remorseful and genuine with his promises.

If I mean anything to him, he should do all he can to rebuild the trust that he has broken, win my heart completely again and prove that he will never do such a thing again.

How I would react will depend on how the situation is in reality.

Most things are easier said than done.

But one thing is for sure, and that is; taking my time to process all that happened and decide on what to do and what is best for me without letting my emotions come in the way.

One's reality can be very complicated, but can we make it easy for ourselves?

I guess it is by making ourselves understand that it is better to let go of what will take our peace away in the future.