Punday Monday 286!

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Welcome to Punday Monday!

tl;dr

Make a pun about the topic of the week,
This week’s topic is work
Here's how to make a pun, if you don't know: https://peakd.com/contest/@improv/puns-and-prizes-learn-to-pun-easy-fun-anybody-can-be-a-hit-at-parties

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New To Punday?

Pull up a stool, order a spiked PUNch, and get to know some of the regulars. I'm your PUNtender, @improv.

How To Make a Pun

This contest is open to everyone. Here's a handy dandy guide on how to make a pun: Learn to Pun

Rules for the PUN-test:

  • If you hope to win a prize [1 100% upvote per punster, 2 HSBI for a win), your pun must be your original work
  • Puns must be relevant to the topic of the week to win a prize, but they can be very loosely related.

Last Week's Punday Monday:

Here is last week's Punday Monday, and all the puns that were eligible to win this week are in the comments!

Hang on to your PUNderwear. The Winner of This Week's PUNday Monday Is...

OH, WAS THAT NOT ENOUGH POMP AND CIRCUMSTANCE FOR YOU?

How’s THIS:

DRUMROLL PLEASE…..

@daolibre! I love a pessimist.

This Week's Pun Topic Is:

work
As in
Why do the employees who have to clean the supervisor’s office always seem to get older faster? Because of the man ager.

I'm So Good at Puns

If you've never punned before, it might seem like magic! You can do it, too! Learn how in My Free How-To Guide on Punning!

Related Content:

  • @freewritehouse offers writing and word-smithing contests every week
  • https://bit.ly/improvonpopin to join me on a gaming app where I host funny trivia on Sunday nights, and Spades, Hearts, and Liar’s dice on Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday
puns marlians neoxian creativecoin palnet lolz fun contest funny proofofbrain
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4 comments
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They say hard work pays off. I knew I should have specialised as a "Hard Boil Egg" Chef rather than a "Soft Boil Egg" Chef.

@rayius

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How come buildings that store clothes for shipping aren't called wear houses?

Professional boxers really do punch in and out of work.

Cartographers hate it when I joke about their parchment choices, but rulers!!!...
That's where they draw the line.

I work at a grocery store...You gotta be careful there.
The produce department has eyes and ears everywhere.
The deli is the wurst. They leave the parmesan rinds on the floor! Cheeses Crust!
Something smells fishy back in meat and seafood. Don't get me wrong. I got no beef with them.
The bakery is shady. Something is rising up but I have no proof.
Everyone in the pharmacy always seems to be watching me....or.. maybe that's the drugs.

Maybe I should get another job.....but it's where I have worked since 2001. (no pun)
Happy New Year Everyone! :)

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That's a lot of wonderful puns! You should write them professionally!

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I walked into the bar after work last night and ordered a shot and a beer.

"You look like hell," said the bartender.

I explained that I worked my usual long shift at the circus but today I got fired.

"Oh, that's just awful, your next round is on me," she says.

There are some drawbacks to being fired out of a cannon, but there are some perks as well...
🤡

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