DOES THE MARRIAGE VOWS MEAN ANYTHING ANYMORE?
A true story about a man having an affair with his secretary was told, it spreaded like wild fire and raised alot of contentions whilst some people opposed it's verity, some others found it believable, like me because I had witnessed something similar before.
A quick background check on this guy, he's a father, in his early forties. He has been married for 16 years. Three children, ages 13, 11, and eight,
He was the typical well to do man with monthly earnings of about seven figures, a corporate organization's manager and leader of some NGO's. He owns his home and other properties across the United States, living so comfortably, travels for both business and pleasure and also founder of a private corporation.
A brief history of his marriage. He is married to a woman of substance literally, a woman of many businesses, she is self-sufficient, can live a comfortable life with or without her husband's money, travels for both business and pleasure too, some trips are funded by her while her husband takes care of some. Their Children attend Ivy League schools throughout the city, they are spoilt with any material possession they desire.
His wife was horrified and dismayed when she learned of her husband's infidelity. Her marriage to her spouse had been happy for all of their years together. She could attest to the fact that her spouse was a good man who was devoted and disciplined. She and her husband shared almost everything and were very open with each other, so it really broke her when she found this out.
Details are not given as to how wife found out of her hubby’s affair, but husband did not deny it. He was only sorry because he got caught.
He begged, and begged, he was sorry, he pleaded and he restituted but to no avail, he even had his kids plead with their mother. She told the kids that it had nothing to do with them and the issue was between their father and her. The kids shouldn’t get involved in mummy and daddy's issues.
He contacted his family and told them what he had done. They pleaded and begged as well but the woman didn't think that was going to cut it,it echoed this sentiment and she felt it was completely unrelated to them.
She and her spouse were at odds. They should stay out of it. Husband insisted on begging, but wife refused.
She couldn't bear to accept the possibility that her loving and devoted spouse would betray her and violate their marriage vows.
The husband in a bid to please his wife, made a payment to his secretary and fired her. He shut her off from any communication.
Wife was hurt and angry, so she ceased to provide for her husband. She stopped cooking for him and no longer slept in the same room with him. She couldn't stay with a man who has had intercourse with someone else.
Merely thinking about the situation was irritating, I could feel the woman's pain. She stopped communicating with her husband they practically lived in thier home as though they were housemates.
Husband did not stop apologizing, he was genuinely sorry, and at this point I was sorry for him but could he undo what he had done? No. That means that things will never go back to the way they were in the past. He inquired of her to tell him what he could do to make amends and have her trust him again.
He cried, he pleaded, he had been begging for months. He wasn't going to give up. He desired the return of his wife. He desired the love they had had. Nothing he did or said had any effect.
And sunddenly out of nowhere he swallowed poison and killed himself one day, tired and fed up with everything and unable to bear the quiet treatment any longer.
He claimed in his letter that he couldn't deal with himself and live his life knowing his wife wouldn't forgive him, so he took his own life.
When I first heard the story, I was angry at the husband but after careful thought about this matter I realized that both the man and his wife are at fault for the was the story ended, but keep in mind that this is only my opinion and I'll really appreciate your comments and wait for your response on what you think about this.
I think the husband is at fault for betraying his wife's trust and violating their marriage vows and I understand the wife's pain, she was hurt, broken, angry and didn't think she deserved what her husband did bit I think she took it too far.
When they were getting married, they both said for better for worse and I think one of the worse is forgiving them no matter what, she could have chosen to divorce him, I think that would have been better but punishing him like that, and torturing him in the presence of the kids, family is just unfair.
It just shows that the level of love she has for him is questionable, of course she had romantic feelings for him but love is a different ball game all together and I feel like the story would have ended differently if she had made a different decision. Don't get me wrong I'm not putting the blame on the woman, the man deserve alot of things but he didn't deserve to die and at this point I think there should be a marriage school, where people can learn the basic and incorporate certain qualities in themselves before they decide to live together for the rest of their lives.
I'm not expecting a perfect marriage because we can't be perfect as individuals but the case of men being unfaithful in their marriage had caused more harm than good and the funny part is they rarely have good reasons to cheat.
What are your opinions? Who do you believe was at fault here? Could there have been anything done differently?
Let's get started. This is based on a genuine story, and maybe someone may learn from your opinion.
DISCLAIMER : Images used were sourced and are in no way related to the actual people in the story .
Thanks for stopping by my blog.
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