[ENG]

As teenagers we may go through the imperious need to be accepted, to be part of a group, to "fit in" and we stop being ourselves, without our own personality, personally it did not happen to me but I did suffer from loneliness, however, I enjoyed being alone more than being surrounded by hypocrisies. Growing up, many people continue in this plan, pretending what they are not in order to "fit in". The same thing happens with human relationships, we put ourselves aside, to make the other person see that we care, that we love them, we do everything so that they value us and give us back in the same way, but this is not always the case, it is not always reciprocal and we begin to suffer. This is where we get attached to people who are really a cactus.

Two things have been difficult for me to learn to master and they are: Emotional attachment and self-love, all the unpleasant experiences I have lived have left so many traumas in me that today I am in therapy, therapy has helped me a lot, getting in the hands of a real expert, a real psychologist or psychiatrist committed to your mental and emotional health is a blessing, because that specialist who only comes to medicate you and does not treat in depth your needs, the origin of the problem, you are just a number for him, look for another specialist. Being in the hands of a true health expert has helped me a lot these days, I treat my self-esteem, my serious problem with depression and free myself from the terrible emotional attachment that hurts me so much, because I stay attached to people for whom I am only an object of use. No more.

I have learned to say Enough! Respect! This is it! and No more! These words are really powerful and liberating. I just had to say them to someone I loved very much, but from whom I suffered a lot because of emotional attachment, I stripped myself of everything I worked for years for that person to give me value but she did not value it, she lived entrenching my defects, pointing me out for everything and nothing, she invented a series of phenomena which even I am not part of and thanks to my doctor I could understand that I am not responsible for the experiences and traumas of that person, who I wanted to help and who was only hurting me. That person used key words like this. I want to be alone, I don't want anything with anyone, I am better off alone, I don't need you and things that I thought I could help him and make him see that he was wrong and that I was always there in spite of his tantrums, however, I was only his revenge for everything he experienced in his life. I let him go and I thought it was definitive, it turns out that he came back and I thought I was strong enough to handle the situation, soon he wrapped me up and hit me again in my self-esteem, in my ego with accusations and unrealistic accusations, the end was logical, to continue to hurt me, to hurt me and to continue using me. Playing with my feelings and emotions, coming and going at his will, taking me and discarding me whenever he wants, playing cat and mouse, until, far from falling back into depression and crying because he hurt me, I just used the magic words and freed myself.