Ladies of Hive Community Contest #144 ~ Intimate Violent Partner

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Intimate partner violence
Intimidation, threats, or verbal abuse. Expand on what you know or how you deal with this matter considering almost one-in-every-four homes appears to suffer silently.

One thing I have always been grateful for is that over the few times I have engaged in any intimate relationship, I have never experienced or encountered an intimate violent partner.

I remember discussing with a younger colleague of mine when told me about a particular person that has been wooing her and seems violent in his words, character, and actions although he has never expressed this to her since she is currently in my state and he is in another state, he comes around to see her once in a while and the worst of it all is that her mother feels that he is the man best suits for her and whatever he does he is right as that is the only way he can show to her how much he loves her, so she should be ready to marry him.

I made a very unique statement to her, "Forever is too long a time to make a wrong choice because you are going to be living with it forever till death do you both part".

I am not against young marriage, or marriage itself, because I constantly tell people to take their time in choosing a partner, the worst one could do for themselves is marry a violent partner. Although I facially look young but I am of age for marriage the thought of marrying a man who hits me and disrespects me, is making me slack back in my choice of partner. I want to be happy for the rest of my life even if I do not have it all, than be miserable in a loveless, violent marriage.

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I have always been against intimate partner violence, I do not support and have never been in support of it, and one thing I tell/warn my partner is " Never raise your hands on me not for any reason.

I know nobody prays for a violent partner but setting boundaries and speaking up when necessary is going to do one good in a relationship, I am not in a relationship to be detected to, I am not a relationship to be guarded constantly, and I am not in a relationship because I am miserable being single, because I have noticed most ladies involve themselves in a relationship even when they obviously know and can see that their partner is violent but they would vehemently refuse to walk out of it.

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Over time, they end up having it in their subconscious that they are the reasons their partner is always violent, and it is always hard to talk these particular sets of people into leaving such a relationship.

There are the others who can't leave because they are tied to something, like their children, lack of good background, or lack of finances, now these set of people could be easily talked out of such relationships especially when you do go about attacking their partner or them and just making them see the reasons why their life is at stake at the moment.

Most are still in these abusive relationships because they are afraid of what extent their partner could go to if they decide to walk out of it. As most violent partners always end up threatening the lives of their victims.

I wouldn't for any reason encourage anybody to remain with a violent partner as their life is at risk and if I encourage anyone to walk out of such relationships and it seems it's too much of a big deal, I guess I would just let the person dance to the rhythm of the music they are listening to.

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This is my entry to the Ladies of Hive Community Contest #144.

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Thank you for reading through!