Nickname given and recieved. It's always fun

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(Edited)
Nickname comes from different sources. It might be due to a character or attitude exhibited or an endearment. It can emanate from a mistake made or an attribute that fits

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Kenneth Kaunda (the former Zambia president) was nicknamed "the crying president". He's known for almost breaking down in tears when talking about poverty, death, and every other tragic incidence

The Nigerian president, (Mohamodu Buari) was named Johny walker because he traveled frequently outside the country when he was freshly elected

The first time I understood nickname was when I heard my dad's friend calling him Masquerade. At first, I was confused. I was still very young. Dad, is masquerade also your name? He smiled and said no. But why they were calling him masquerade he didn't explain

As time went by, his friends started calling me "the son of masquerade". I loved it. Each time they call me by the name, I answer with joy. And to make it more unique and funny, they taught me the proper response to the call. So each time they call me the son of masquerade, I answer them with the tone and they would laugh and laugh while on several bottles of beer

So one day, while they were in our compound sharking their bottles, I asked them why they call my dad masquerade. It was a funny question but they replied by asking questions

Do you know a masquerade?

Have you seen one before?

Do you know how a masquerade talks?

My answer was yes.

Then they said "Your dad has an extraordinary tick voice. He's fearless and tough. And anyone with these attributes merits the masquerade attire

He was there looking at us with his Guinness bottle in his right hand. He was just smiling as if he was already tipsy from some sips

That was the first time I came across a nickname. My dad was a masquerade and I'm the son of a masquerade

I initiated nicknames for many people in high school. Let's discuss two


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These two names I can never forget. I mean their real names. Abdulrahman Olalekan, and Olanrewaju Mutsephew. They are both Muslim guys. Mutsephew has a bent back but that's never a problem. But each time we are less busy in the class and we feel like making ourselves laugh by telling stories, he's always telling the story of tortoise. Everybody in the class know him for that. So one day, as we were telling stories, they asked whose turn it was to tell his story and I said "tortoise" is the next person. Students can be implicating sometimes. They took it up immediately and that was how his real name vanished. The only place you can find his real name is in the school register. Even some funny teachers call him by his nickname. He nearly beat me up one day for bringing up the name

The second guy was Olalekan. He's an unserious element. Very poor in academics and never zealous to learn. He brings computer games to school every day. The only time he gives himself a break is when he want to eat or when some tough teachers enter the class. Apart from that, he would be on game all through

On that fateful day, we were being taught home economics and he was busy pressing his computer game. He has a way of stylishly bending his head that would make it difficult for the teacher to note him. The teacher asked us a question and most of us raised our hands to answer. He was sitting beside me on that day. He left his seat and came to show me the new level he merit. Truth be told, I play the game too but only when I'm not busy with my academics. Due to the fact that I told him to put the game away when the teacher entered and he refused, I decided to fuck him up because he has become addicted

I told the teacher that my friend has not been answering questions that she should call him. It was as if I commanded the teacher, she followed my instructions and called him to answer the question. When he stood up, he was looking like a lucozade. He didn't know the question talk more of knowing the answer. He was carried away by the game and never paid attention. As the Good God would punish him through me, he asked me in silence the answer to the question and I said "LOCUST BEANS". Then he confidently answered the teacher

In case you don't know locust beans, it's a local condiment used in cooking. It has an offensive odour in it's raw state but when used as condument or spices, it's delicious. And it's mostly sold by aged women. Flies love locust beans because of it smell. If you stay near the women selling this stuff in the market, you would have to cover your nose


Image source is a screenshot from a playing youtube video on locust beans documentry

There was an endless laugh in the class room. The teacher almost rolled in the floor and all the students reacted in unison. He was standing like someone that was sold out on slave trade because he looked different and confused at that moment

The question was "What do you use to brush your teeth"? And my friends answer was locust beans (courtesy @ckole in silence). He looked at me and I couldn't help but laugh even more. We were in junior school 3 then and believe me, he was called locust beans till we graduated and some of us still call him locust beans till today.

There are many others like

  • Anus mouth: (His lips looks exactly like the tip of the anus)
  • Hammer head of horror: (He has a big head with a horrible shape)
  • Duck: (She walks like a duck)
  • Eye glass and so on: (He won't see well without his glasses)
It was fun naming them. Apart from "the son of masquerade" given to me by my dad's friend, I was also nicknamed "pakoo" out of anger from some students because I'm fond of giving nicknames to people. Nicknames when called brings excitement especially when the reaction of the person with the nickname is negative. Some people hate it because it was given as a result of their silly act or look, while some don't give a damn. Do have a lovely weekend guys.

Thanks for reading
This is ckole the laughing gas
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5 comments
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Take a read of the entry guidelines in the annoucement post. You did this last week too, and were deemed ineligible for prizes.

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I get it. My eyes are fucking me up. I've adjusted the tag. That won't happen again. Thanks a lot.

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