Project and advance // The question that moves (Spanish/English)

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A friendly greeting dear Hivers, I found this wonderful initiative The question that moves, proposed by the colleague @damarysvibra in the beautiful community of Holos&Lotus. This is an exercise to which we can get a lot of benefit, I usually do it when I feel stuck and I see that I do not advance or I do it slower than I expect.

At this point in my life I have gone through many things in a very short time, things that have neutralized me, turned me off and damaged me; however I feel that it has been an exercise of resilience, because every day I feel stronger. All the difficulties have made me discover new things about myself, they have also revealed many traumas and things that I had been dragging from my childhood, now I can see more clearly and set goals to heal and transform the things that do not do me good.

Since I was very young I have always procrastinated, I don't know why, as I have always said I grew up in a dysfunctional family, my father and my mother are procrastinators par excellence. That is why I did not learn from an early age about responsibility, commitment, dedication, the satisfaction of completing a project or achieving a goal. Nor did I learn about self-demand or self-reinforcement, things that greatly affected my self-esteem. An example of this was my responsibilities at school, if I did not do a task or did not study my mother would suggest not to go and avoid the situation, I almost did not go to class and nobody sat with me to reflect. I grew up thinking that everything could be avoided and that has hurt me a lot.

I mention this because that procrastination has made my periods of inaction longer, as I tend to avoid problems and therefore solutions. When I reflect on Where am I? and Where do I want to be? I have a hard time committing myself to reach my goals. However, I have learned to regulate myself, to set short goals that help me reach my big objectives.

It is very exhausting, but like everything beautiful in this life, it is a daily work. As I said at the beginning, I have had several long periods of inaction, but I have come out ahead, now I feel that I am in a very calm and organic moment of my life. I have several goals for the next three, six and twelve months; clear and concrete goals.

One of them is a cell phone, which I hope will be the most immediate. I haven't been able to have a phone for about six years, which has made it very difficult for me to communicate with friends and work. Now that I am in Hive I feel more than ever the need for a cell phone to optimize the work and dynamics of the blog. Before I had not been able to acquire one due to economic issues, but since I am in Hive I see a light at the end of all the material shortages.

Another goal, which is focused for the next six months, is to repair the family car, which for the last nine months has had an engine failure and we have not been able to raise the money to fix it. Simultaneously with the car I also have another goal for this period of time which is a washing machine, since it has been very hard to cover that task with rented washing machines, I know that this will optimize the time and work at home for me and my partner.

And in less than twelve months, I hope to solve the housing issue, I know this is more difficult, but I do not mean a home of my own (although that is my big dream) but rather to be able to be in a friendlier place, than where we live now. This is a borrowed house and on several occasions we have been asked to leave, but it has been difficult for us to get out of here. However, my partner and I have a very clear plan about this situation and we know that we will come out of this okay.

It feels very good to talk about our plans with other people, to share the projections we have, because when we say it for others the sentence takes on greater force. I appreciate the space, because I usually talk about these things with my partner, but being able to write it and share it has given me an unparalleled freshness, as if I had released a tension that I had not identified.

I hope my post serves to motivate others, because I know that sometimes goals seem very big or far away, but the only thing we need to achieve them is to focus and commit ourselves. So many good vibes to all, until next time.